Tuesday 31 March 2020


The Case Against Mrs. Ames (1936 -b/w) - Bland Paramount mystery.

Mad Holiday(1936 - b/w) - Bland Thin Man-esque Edmund Lowe vehicle, so generic I thought I'd seen this in February.

Gone with the Wind (1939) - The first miniseries.

We Are Not Alone (1939 - b/w) - Faux-British stodge with Paul Muni and Flora Robson.

Juarez (1939 - b/w) - Ludicrously OTT story of Napoleon III in  Mexico with Paul Muni, Bette Davis and John Garfield.

The Letter (1940 - b/w) - Sumptuous women's picture exotica with Bette Davis.

The Wagons Roll at Night (1941 - b/w) - Bogie circus mush.

Sgt. York (1941 - b/w) - Always assumed it was a western, and despite being set in the front of WW1, it still kinda is.

This was Paris (1943 - b/w) - Ann Dvorak propaganda made in Teddington.

Gentleman Jim (1942 - b/w) - Errol Flynn boxes, as James Corbet. Ward Bond is John L. Sullivan. There's a character called Peter Jackson. Nice production design.
See also City or Conquest (1940 - b/w) with James Cagney.

Address Unknown (1944 - b/w) - Ropey Columbia mystery with Paul Lukas.

Shadow of A Woman (1946 - b/w) - Another ropey Warner mystery.
See also South of Suez (1940 - b/w - which features the Bovril/Schweppes-at-Piccadilly sign), Money and the Woman (1940 - b/w), East of the River (1940 - b/w), Lady With Red Hair (1940 - b/w), Knockout (1941 - b/w),  the Nurse's Secret (1941 - b/w), Blues in the Night (1941 - b/w), Nine Lives are Not Enough (1941 - b/w), Flight to Destiny (1941 - b/w), Strange Alibi (1941 - b/w), the Gay Falcon (1941 - b/w), Juke Girl (1942 - b/w), The Big Shot (1942 - b/w), King's Row (1942 - b/w),  Spy Ship (1943 - b/w), Crime by Night (1944), You Can't Escape Forever (1942 - b/w), Uncertain Glory (1944 - b/w, Errol Flynn war-fare), Danger Signal (1945 - b/w), Her Kind of Man (1946 - b/w), Cry Wolf (1947 - b/w, with Errol Flynn), The Unsuspected (1947 - b/w), Possessed (1947 - b/w, with Joan Crawford), The Unfaithful (1947 - b/w), Nora Prentiss (1947), Whiplash (1948 - b/w), Smart Girls Don't Talk (1948 - b/w), Flaxy Martin (1949 - b/w), Homicide (1949 - b/w)

Devotion (1946 - b/w) - Gothy but unrealistic version of the Brontes with Nancy Coleman, Olivia de Havilland and Ida Lupino, and Arthur Kennedy's first depiction of a Northern Englishman of Irish descent. Not his last.
Also watched a ton of Warner melodramas - wartime tosh like Wings for the Eagle (1942 - b/w), The Old Acquaintance (1943 - b/w), The Very Thought of You (1944 - b/w), In Our Time (1944 - b/w), period melodramas like One Foot in Heaven (1941 - b/w - which seems to be a western but then minsiter Fredric March has a milkshake), My Reputation (1946 - b/w) Escape Me Never (1947 - b/w - with Errol Flynn and Ida Lupino dressed as a schoolgirl - yeech), Law of the Tropics (1941 - b/w), Shining Victory (1941 - b/w), Four Mothers (1941 - b/w), Three Secrets (1941 - b/w), The Constant Nymph (1943 - with unconvincing schoolgirl Joan Fontaine), The Hard Way (1943 - b/w, musical melodrama with Ida Lupino),

Winter Meeting (1948 - b/w) - Bette Davis romantic tedium with the barely-there James Davis, who is so nothingy I forgot that he was actually Jim "Jock Ewing" Davis.

Strange Bargain (1949 - b/w) - Generic RKO noir, generic enough to be sequelized in a episode of Murder, She Wrote with the original cast.

The Fountainhead (1949 - b/w) - Dreary Ayn Rand saga of construction with Gary Cooper and Pat Neal.

It's  A Great Feeling (1949)  - Doris Day musical - one big ad for the Warner studios.

Convicted (1950 - b/w) - Rote noir with Brod Crawford and Glenn Ford.

The Flying Missile (1950 - b/w) - Rote militaria with Glenn Ford.

Fortunes of Captain Blood (1950 - b/w) - Dreadful pirate nonsense with Louis Hayward, an insult to Errol Flynn.

711 Ocean Drive (1950 - b/w) - Rote noir with Edmond O'Brien.
See also Between Midnight and Dawn (1950 - b/w), The Tougher they Come (1950 - b/w), The Big Gusher (1951 - b/w), Never Trust A Gambler (1951 - b/w), Two of A Kind (1951 - b/w), Walk East on Beacon (1952 - b/w - Finlay Currie is beautifully out of place),  The Sniper (1952 - b/w), The 49th Man (1953 - b/w), The Glass Wall (1953 - b/w), The Miami Story (1954 - b/w)/Miami Expose (1956 - b/w), Pushover (1954 - b/w), The Crooked Web (1955 - b/w), The Night Holds Terror (1955 - b/w), Crashout (1955 -b/w), Tight Spot (1955 - b/w), Women's Prison (1955 - b/w), Over- Exposed (1956 - b/w), The Garment Jungle (1957 - b/w), The Strange One (1957 - b/w), Case Against Brooklyn (1958 - b/w).

Problem Girls (1953 - b/w) - Columbia juvenile delinquency shite.

Tarawa Beachhead (1958 - b/w) - Dreary Columbia war B-film set in New Zealand.See also Eight Iron Men (1952 - a rare thing - a Hollywood production starring Bonar Colleano), El Alamein (1953 - b/w), Battle Stations (1956 - B/W), The Bold and the Brave (1956 - b/w), Hellcats of the Navy (1957 - b/w), The Ghost of the China Sea (1958 - b/w).

Breakfast at Tiffany's (1961) - Mickey Rooney's convincingly... Scottish.

Patton (1970) - It's long but it manages to capture the war, and it's shot in Cheshire.

Pumping Iron (1975) - Arnie flexes his muscles for the queers.

Risky Business (1983) - Tom Cruise is such a pillock.

Heroes Shed No Tears (1986) - Ace mercenary actioner.

Born on the Fourth of July (1988) - Tom Cruise loses his legs. Are we supposed to feel sorry?

Groundhog Day (1993) - Typically bland 90s comedy.

Once Were Warriors (1994) - A brutal but evocative depiction of working-class Maori life. But it might be a bit too gritty for its own good.

Leon (1994) - Meh.

Heat (1995) - Meh.

Fallen (1996) - Horror Express in the Hood, with angels.

Drive (1997) - Well-made straight to video actioner. Poor Brittany Murphy.

Seven (1997) - It's grungy and stiff.

Any Given Sunday (1999) - American football really is a game for ****s.

Chopper (2000) - Urhgh.

Mom and Dad (2016) - Nicolas Cage schlock.

Terraformars (2019) - God. An overlong mess that just when it seems to end, keeps on going and going. But the CGI cockroach-men are magnificent.  Based on an anime where one of the characters (who is Japanese here) was called Victoria Wood. This film needed a blonde Northern lass with a piano. The leads, who I presumed were lovers, are actually brother and sister. The cast includes Kane Kosugi, son of Sho, and Rinko Kikuchi.

Sunday 29 March 2020


Earthworm Tractors (1936 - b/w) - Joe E. Brown. Duh.

The Last Outpost (1936 - b/w) - Cary Grant colonial plodder.

The Gay Deception (1935 -b/w) - Misleadingly titled romance with Francis Lederer.

Stage Door (1937 - b/w) - Enthusiastic and charming "a bunch of girls" drama with Ginger Rogers, Lucille Ball and Katharine Hepburn.

Brother Rat (1938 - b/w) and Brother Rat and a Baby (1940 - b/w) - Military school comedies with Reagan.

Tear Gas Squad (1940 - b/w) - Musical cop b-movie with John Payne.
See also other Warner cheapies like Truck Busters (1943 - b/w), Secret Enemies (1942 - b/w), Gambling on the High Seas (1940 - b/w), Bullet Scars (1942 - b/w), The Last Ride (1944 -b/w - which features a Captain Butler - not Craig Charles, thankfully). Bullets for O'Hara (1940 - b/w), A Fugitive from Justice (1940 - b/w).

Father is a Prince (1940 - b/w) - Forgettable Warner family sitcom-B. See also Calling All Husbands (1940 - b/w) and She Couldn't Say No (1940 - b/w), Granny Get Your Gun (1940 - b/w), Always a Bride (1940 - b/w, with George Reeves), the Great Mr. Nobody (1941 - b/w, with Eddie Albert), Thieves Fall Out (1941 - b/w) and An Angel from Texas (1940 - b/w), Honeymoon For Three  (1941 - b/w), Kisses for Breakfast (1941 - b/w) and Wallflower (1948 - b/w), Always Together (1948 - b/w) and Janie (1944 - b/w)/Janie Gets Married (1946 - b/w), The House Across the Street (1949 - b/w), Princess O'Rourke (1943 - b/w) and the Male Animal (1942 - b/w) with Olivia De Havilland, 3 Cheers for the Irish (1947 - b/w - Thomas Mitchell being the resident Irish cop), Affectionately Yours (1941 - b/w), Make Your own Bed (1944 - with Jack Carson), Million Dollar Baby (1941 - b/w), That Way with Women (1947 - b/w, despite the good presence of Sydney Greenstreet), June Bride (1948 - b/w), A Kiss in the Dark (1949 - b/w), The Girl from Jones Beach (1949 - b/w)/Voice of the Turtle (1947) with Ronald Reagan, Flight Angels (1940 - b/w), One More Tomorrow (1946 - b/w), Lady Takes A Sailor (1949 - b/w), You're in the Army Now (1941 - b/w) with Jimmy Durante, Two Guys from Milwaukee (1946 - b/w), Doughgirls (1944 -b/w), Pillow to Post (1945 - b/w) with Ida Lupino and Sydney Greenstreet and William Prince in  a rare leading role, Never Say Goodbye (1946 - b/w - schmaltzy family comedy with Errol Flynn) and Strawberry Blonde (1941 - b/w) with James Cagney. Lots of Warner comedies.

It All Came True (1940 - b/w) - Musical biopic with Ann Sheridan, Humphrey Bogart and Una O'Connor.

Brother Orchid (1940 - b/w) - Edward G. Robinson gangster com-drama. Thought I'd seen this.

George Washington Slept Here (1941 - b/w)/The Horn Blows at Midnight (1942 - b/w) - Jack Benny baffles me.

Singapore Woman (1941 - b/w) - Ropey exotic romance B-movie.

Free and Easy (1941 - b/w) - Bland B-comedy from MGM with Robert Cummings, Ruth Hussey and Nigel Bruce.

Murder on the Waterfront (1943 - b/w) - Dance hall mystery B with John Loder. Forgettable.

Roughly Speaking (1945 - b/w) - Dreary Rosalind Russell drama.  See also the aptly named No Time for Comedy (1940 - b/w).

The Hucksters (1947 - b/w) - Rote romcom with Deborah Kerr, Ava Gardner, Clark Gable and Sydney Greenstreet.

Always Leave them Laughing (1949 - b/w) - Milton Berle is one of those US comedy giants I find baffling.

He's A Cockeyed Wonder (1950 - b/w) - Mickey Rooney nonsense.

Emergency Wedding (1950 - b/w) - Forgettable Larry Parks vehicle.

The West Point Story (1950 - b/w) - Bland musical with Doris Day and James Cagney.

Fast Company (1950 - b/w) - Horse racing blarney with Howard Keel and Polly Bergen.

Please Believe Me (1950 - b/w) - Culture-clash romcom with Deborah Kerr and Robert Walker.  See also The Skipper Surprised His Wife (1950 - b/w).

The Big Hangover (1950) - Forgettable romcom with Van Johnson and Elizabeth Taylor.  See also Three Guys Named Mike (1951 - b/w).

The Yellow Cab Man (1950 - b/w) - Red Skelton, again. Argh.

Pretty Baby (1950 - b/w) - Silly fake-baby nonsense.

Key to the City (1950 - b/w) - Loretta Young and her rapist Clark Gable in dreary comedy.

The Reformer and the Redhead (1950 - b/w) - Ropey romcom with Dick Powell and June Allyson.

Flame of Stamboul (1951 - b/w) - Ropey Columbia B-picture. See also Hell's Horizon (1955 - b/w) with the odd duo of John Ireland and Chet Baker.

Angels in the Outfield (1951 - b/w) - Ropey Disney-esque (Disney remade it in 1994) comedy, baffling to anyone not into baseball.

Home Town Story (1951 - b/w) - Bland B-comedy, with Marilyn Monroe.

Harem Girl (1951 - b/w) - Silly Joan Davis comedy.

Goodbye My Fancy (1951 - b/w) - Moan Crawford.

Red Snow (1952 - b/w) - Columbia B about Communists vs Inuit.

Pat and Mike (1952) - Decently acted Tracy/Hepburn vehicle, but quite pedestrian.

Room for One More (1952) - Family comedy with Cary Grant.

Love is Better than Ever (1952 - b/w) - Treacly romcom with Elizabeth Taylor and Larry Parks.

A Young Man with Ideas (1952 - b/w) - Glenn Ford vehicle with an ironic title.

The Four Poster (1952 - b/w) - A reocrded stage lay with Lilli Palmer and Rex Harrison padded out with UPA animation.
See also The Happy Time (1952 - b/w), Phffft (1954 - b/w)/Full of Life (1956 - b/w)/The Marrying Kind (1952 - b/w) with Judy Holliday, the gritty My Six Convicts (1952 - yes, that's the title), Kill the Umpire (1950 - b/w).

Fearless Fagan (1952 - b/w) - Disneyesque lion story.

Strictly Dishonorable (1952 - b/w) - Janet Leigh and ageing Leonard Cohen-lookalike Italian tenor Ezio Pinza in rote romcom.

You for Me (1952 - b/w) - Silly Peter Lawford vehicle. See also Just This Once (1952 - b/w).

The Clown (1953 - b/w) - Dreary Red Skelton showbiz version of The Champ (1931 - b/w).

Confidentially Connie (1953 - b/w) - Cowboy comedy with Janet Leigh.

Dream Wife (1953 - b/w) - Silly faux-Arab nonsense with Cary and Deborah.

Trouble Along the Way (1953 - b/w) - John Wayne romances Donna Reed in dreary Catholic college nonsense.

The Actress (1953 - b/w) - Sentimental. The Ruth Gordon Story starring Jean Simmons.

Our Miss Brooks (1956 - b/w) - Eve Arden, Gale Gordon and "Dick" Crenna in adaptation of the 50s radio/TV sitcom. Seeing Crenna as a thirty-year-old teenage nerd with a squeaky voice and bow tie is disturbing, knowing the older, craggy Crenna.

The Catered Affair (1956 - b/w) - Debbie Reynolds, Bette Davis, Ernest Borgnine and Barry Fitzgerald in a TV play adaptation.

Top Secret Affair (1957 - b/w) - Susan Hayward and Kirk Douglas romance.

The Girl He Left Behind (1956 - b/w) - Natalie Wood and Tab Hunter in lazy teen military comedy.

This Could Be The Night (1957 - b/w) - Bland Jean Simmons comedy.

Too Much Too Soon (1958 - b/w) - Dorothy Malone is too old as Diana Barrymore. Errol Flynn looks pissed, as John Barrymore.

The Tunnel of Love (1958 - b/w) - Hohum screwballer with Doris Day and Richard Widmark.

Don't Raise the Bridge, Lower the River (1968) - Begins with Jerry Lewis outside the Eros cartoon cinema in Piccadilly. This is weird. It's set in England. The co-leads are Jacqueline Pearce and as the US trailer has it, "Ber-naaaard Cribbins". Terry-Thomas has a guest appearance, and the baddie is Nicholas Parsons. Oh, and Pat Routledge makes her film debut, after years of TV and stage work behind her. She's very much in the Kathleen Freeman role, but the slapstick is given to Cribbins, because this is Lewis in his self-centred macho playboy mode. And Lewis is so smug and unlikeable. And god, this film took me several attempts.

Fast Walking (1982) - Well-produced prison film by Kubrick associate James Harris, with a decent cast of character actors - Tim McIntire, Timothy Carey, Susan Tyrrell...

Sword of the Valiant - The Legend of Sir Gawain and the Green Knight (1984) - Glossy but rubbish Cannon adaptation, with an insanely overqualified cast - Sean Connery, Trevor Howard, Peter Cushing, Lila Kedrova, Ronald Lacey and Wilfrid Brambell but the actual stars are Miles O'Keeffe, Leigh Lawson and Cyrielle Claire.

Rewatched the Sword and the Sorcerer, and realised that in a fine print, I realised its greatness. It is the ultimate cinematic realisation of the dog-eared fantasy paperback cover.

Friday 27 March 2020


Son of the Gods (1930 - b/w) - Richard Barthlemess unconvincing as a Chinaman, even as one who supposedly passes for white.

Glorifying the American Girl (1929 - b/w)/Whoopee! (1930)/Palmy Days (1931 - b/w)/Show Business (1944 - b/w)/The Kid from Spain (1932)/Roman Scandals (1933 - b/w)/Strike me Pink (1936  b/w)/Forty Little Mothers (1940 - b/w)/Thank Your Lucky Stars (1943 - b/w)/If You Knew Susie (1948 - b/w) - Eddie Cantor's ambition fascinates me, but the material (blackface etc) doesn't.

Madam Satan (1930 - b/w) - Pre-code variety.

Tugboat Annie (1933 - b/w) - Fun Pacific Northwest adventure with an older female lead, here Marie Dressler, then Marjorie Rambeau in the sequel, Tugboat Annie Sails Again (1940 - b/w).

Below the Sea (1933 - b/w) - Forgettable Ralph Bellamy/Fay Wray vehicle.

Stingaree (1934 - b/w) - Richard Dix/Irene Dunne highwayman romance.

A Midsummer's Night Dream (1935 - b/w) - Is it heresy to say that Mickey Rooney is the best Puck? It is probably his best performance. He is a ferocious little demon, none of the mugging old vaudevillian/embarrassing grandad/overgrown adolescent of later films. This film looks gorgeous, too.

The Dancing Pirate (1936 - b/w) - Peculiar, tatty musical with Frank Morgan.

Ramona (1936) - Bland colour story of Loretta Young as a "HALF BREED" and Don Ameche.

The Bold Caballero (1936) - Threadbare Zorro adap from Republic - in color.

Murder by an Aristocrat (1936 - b/w) - Forgettable Warner B mystery with Lyle Talbot.

When's Your Birthday (1937) - Joe E fecking Brown.

Ebb Tide (1937)/Men With Wings (1938) - Early color adventures with Ray Milland. Blandly entertaining and solid. The former is more interesting, plus has Barry Fitzgerald.

Nothing Sacred (1937) - Baffling Carole Lombard comedy.

Victoria the Great (1937)/Sixty Glorious Years (1938) - Ponderous, colourful Anna Neagle-as-Victoria biopic.

Heart of the North (1938) - Early color Northern, with Dick Foran.

The Buccaneer (1938 - b/w)  -Lavish though samey pirate adventure with Fredric March plus brief colour sequences.

Kentucky (1938)-  Horse racing dullness with Richard Greene.

Spawn of the North (1938 - b/w) - A really authentic feeling Arctic drama with Dorothy Lamour, John Barrymore, Henry Fonda and George Raft, and Slicker the Seal as himself.

Her Jungle Love (1938) - Dorothy Lamour jungle tosh. See also  The Jungle Princess (1936 - b/w), Tropic Holiday (1938 - b/w), Moon Over Burma (1940 - b/w) and Road to Bali (1952).

My Son is Guilty (1939 - b/w) - Forgettable Bruce Cabot Columbia-B.

Hollywood Cavalcade (1939)  -The usual early color musical about making  a musical, with Alice Faye and Don Ameche.

Disputed Passage (1939 - b/w) - Dorothy Lamour plays a Chinese girl. Just as shonky as it sounds.

Men Against the Sky (1940 - b/w)/Marines Fly High (1940 - b/w) - Interchangeable Richard Dix air films.
See also I'm Still Alive (1941 - b/w).

Dulcy (1940 - b/w) - Rote Ann Sothern comedy. See also Swing Shift Maisie (1943 - b/w), Three Hearts for Julia (1943 - b/w), Undercover Maisie (1947 - b/w).

International Squadron (1941 - b/w) - Reagan in the RAF. Slightly entertaining. It has Cockney yokels reading Flash Gordon.

Down in San Diego (1941 - b/w) - Forgettable Nancy Drew-ish story with Bonita Granville.

Steel Against the Sky (1941 - b/w) - Forgettable story of bridgemakers with Craig Stevens and Alexis Smith.

Highways by Night (1942 - b/w) - Forgettable Richard Carlson B.

I Was Framed (1942 - b/w) - Another Warner cheapie.

Joan of Paris (1942 - b/w) - Atmospheric if circular French Resistance saga, "with Alan Ladd as Baby". Sadly, not remade as Dirty Dancing.

Rings on her Fingers (1942 - b/w) - Typical rote romcom, with Henry Fonda and Gene Tierney.

Seven Miles from Alcatraz (1942 - b/w) - Forgettable prison escape.

Born to Sing (1942 - b/w) - Tiring teen B-musical with one of the Bowery Boys.

The Gorilla Man (1943 - b/w) - Rote faux-British spy propaganda, not the Monogram-esque cheapie the title suggests.

Whistling in Brooklyn (1943 - b/w) - I've had enough of Red Skelton.

Air Raid Wardens (1943 - b/w)  - Stan and Ollie are getting on.

Adventures of a Rookie (1943 - b/w) - Forgotten comedy duo Brown and Carney in a forgotten flick.

Highway West (1944 - b/w) - Forgettable rural action with Arthur Kennedy.

Marine Raiders (1944 - b/w)/Bombardier (1943 - b/w) - More WW2 aviation/marine propaganda, with Pat O'Brien.

The Spanish Main (1945) - Routine colour pirate film with Paul Henreid and Maureen O'Hara and fellow Dub JM Kerrigan (who apparently supported Bohemian's FC - mind blown).

This Man's Navy (1945 - b/w) - Agreeable war comedy with Wallace Beery and a blimp.

God is my Co-Pilot (1945 - b/w) - Typical aviation propaganda, with Raymond Massey gruffly ordering about.

Those Endearing Young Charms (1945 - b/w) - Misleading title.

Destination Tokyo (1945, sorry 1943 - b/w) - Cary Grant in another identikit naval yarn.

China Sky (1945 - b/w) - Randolph Scott in an unconvincing China alongside that famous Chinese actor, Anthony Quinn. Rote adventure.

Tycoon (1947) - John Wayne in a modern western where he plays a big rich white tycoon in South America. Yawn.

Wild Harvest (1947 - b/w) - Yawn-inducing rural drama with Alan Ladd and Dorothy Lamour.

Deep Valley (1947 - b/w) - Ida Lupino swamp soap - atmospherically shot.

Joan of Arc (1948) - St. Michael spoke to Joan Arc. Did he give her secrets about Marks and Spencer? This is overlong, and Ingrid Bergman is too old. But it's not all bad. It has the credit "and George Coulouris".

Command Decision (1948 - b/w) - Clark Gable military marathon.

Homecoming (1948 - b/w) - Rote war romance with Clark Gable and Lana Turner.

Hunt the Man Down (1950 - B/W)/Bunco Squad (1950 - b/w) - Cheap RKO B-cop shows.
See also Destination Murder (1950 - b/w) and ROADBLOCK (1951 - neat storm drain chase).

Gambling House (1950 - b/w)/The Las Vegas Story (1952 - b/w) - Basically the same film, but the latter done more lavishly. Both with Victor Mature.

Outrage  (1950 - b/w) - Decently-directed by Ida Lupino, but it's just a noir.  See also The Bigamist (1953 - b/w) and Hard, Fast and Beautiful (1951 - b/w). Compare with the Don Siegel-directed Private Hell 36 (1954 - b/w), which stars and was produced by Lupino. Lupino also did lavish but ropey exploitation pics, Never Fear (1950) and Not Wanted (1949).

Born to Be Bad (1950 - b/w) - Joan Fontaine does femme fatale. The usual.

The Secret Fury (1950 - b/w) - Average noir melodrama with Claudette Colbert and Robert Ryan.

The Racket (1951 - b/w) - Rote noir with Robert Mitchum. See also Where Danger Lives (1950 - b/w).

Cry Danger (1951 - b/w) - Rote noir with Dick Powell.

At Sword's Point (1952) - Forgettable swashbuckling, a musketeers spinoff with Cornel Wilde and Maureen O'Hara. See also Sword of Venus (1953 - b/w).

Blackbeard the Pirate (1952) - Rote Treasure Island cash-in with Robert Newton. Unfortunately, the actual lead is the bland Keith Andes.

A Girl in Every Port (1952 - b/w)  - Groucho seems like a sad old man.

Tokyo File 212 (1952 - b/w) - Godawful Japanese-shot B movie.

Second Chance (1953) - Colourful but rote noir with Robert Mitchum and Linda Darnell.

Affair with a Stranger (1953 - b/w) - Bland romcom with Jean Simmons and Victor Mature. See also the Mitchum-starring She Couldn't Say No (1954 - b/w).

Never Wave at A Wac  (1953 - b/w) -  Rosalind Russell plays Paul Douglas' daughter. There's two months different. Russell annoys me.

Susan Slept Here (1954) - Annoying Debbie Reynolds vehicle, with some interesting minimalist dance-dream sequences.

This Is My Love (1954) - Forgettable romantic drama with Linda Darnell.

Underwater! (1955) - Bland swimming odyssey with Jane Russell.

The Solid Gold Cadillac (1956 - b/w) - Judy Holliday infuriates me.

The Conqueror (1956) - It is awful. Dick Powell isn't a good director. Every role is miscast, not just John Wayne. Susan Hayward looks like an Irish country singer from the 70s.  The desert locations are uninspiring. And people died to make this film.

Time Table (1956 - b/w) - Bland noir with Mark Stevens.

Man in the Vault (1956 - b/w) - Forgettable Batjac B-noir with William Campbell.

Death of a Scoundrel (1956 - b/w) - Overlong, well-made but kind of boring George Sanders/Yvonne De Carlo noir-melodrama.

Jet Pilot (1957) - Sexist melodrama. Janet Leigh has to be taught to be a real American girl. John Wayne does the same bullshit he did fighting Japs in Fighting Leathernecks (1951).

Battle of the Coral Sea (1959 - B/W)  - Bland, workmanlike war film with Cliff Robertson and Patricia Cutts, the short-lived first incarnation of Blanche Hunt in Coronation Street.

Wednesday 25 March 2020


Island of Lost Men (1939 - b/w) - I remember this poster in the Halliwell's Filmgoer's Companion. It's a typical 30s B-cheapie with Anna May Wong and Anthony Quinn.

Wildcat Bus (1940 - b/w) - Forgettable RKO B with Fay Wray.

Northern Pursuit (1943 - b/w) - Errol Flynn Northern with Nazis.

In the Meantime, Darling (1944 - b/w) - Weird seeing Frank Latimore as a Fox leading man in this WW2 propaganda from Preminger. Latimore ended up a fixture of Italian B-films, as much in sound as in vision.

The Mighty McGurk (1947 - b/w) - Humdrum if charming comedy with Dean Stockwell and Wallace Beery.

Knock on Any Door (1949 - b/w) - Dreary Bogie courtroom drama. See also The Dark at the Top of the Stairs (1960), no, not that, the interchangeable Let No Man Write My Epitaph (1960).

Saw a ton of tiresome 50s comedies  - Stella (1950 - b/w), A Millionaire for Christy (1951 - b/w), Mother Didn't Tell Me (1951 - b/w), Darling How Could You (1951 - b/w),  My Wife's Best Friend (1952 - b/w), We're Not Married (1952 - b/w), Something for the Birds (1952 - b/w), The Kid from Left Field (1953 - b/w), Forever Female (1953 - b/w), Sheree North vehicles How to be Very, Very Popular in College (1955)/The Lieutenant Wore Skirts (1956), The Buster Keaton Story (1957 - b/w - Donald ****** O'Connor), Kiss Them for Me (1957), I Married A Woman (1958 - Diana Dors USA), This Happy Feeling (1958), Teacher's Pet (1958 - b/w), The Matchmaker (1958 - b/w), The Man Who Understood Women (1959), Gidget (1959), Hounddog Man (1959), Operation Petticoat (1959), A Private's Affair (1959).

Chain Lightning (1950  - b/w) - Bogie flies a plane. Raymond Massey moans. More test pilot boredom.

Backfire (1950) - Slightly-above-average B-noir with Dane Clark and Virginia Mayo.

To Please A Lady (1950) - Dated--even-for-the-time car racing film, with Clark Gable and Barbara Stanwyck. Yes, this the film Gizmo becomes obsessed with in Gremlins.

The Red Badge of Courage (1951 - b/w) - It feels like an educational short.

Cause for Alarm! (1951 - b/w) - Bland suburban noir with Loretta Young.
See also Side Street (1950 - b/w), Shadow on the Wall (1950 - b/w), Dial 1119 (1950 - b/w), Highway 301 (1950 - b/w), Lightning Strikes Twice (1951 - b/w), This Side of the Law (1950 - b/w), Inside the Walls of Folson Prison (1951 - b/w), The Strip (1951 - b/w - Mickey Rooney and Louis Armstrong!), I Was A Communist for the FBI (1951 - B/W), The Sellout (1951 - b/w), The Unknown Man (1951 - b/w), No Questions Asked (1951 - b/w),  the rather neat sinister-kidflick Talk About  A Stranger (1952 - b/w), Jeopardy (1953 - b/w), Cry of the Hunted (1953 - b/w), The System (1953 - b/w), New York Confidential (1955 - b/w), Unchained (1955 -almost Corman-cheap, but now only remembered because of the theme song is yes, Unchained Melody), The Steel Jungle (1956 - b/w), A Cry in the Night (1956 - b/w) House of Numbers (1957 - b/w), Slander (1957 - b/w - the highlight being Van Johnson as a Woody's Roundup/Howdy Doody-type cowboy puppeteer)

Crisis (1950 - b/w) - South American noir, sure I'd seen this before, with José Ferrer and Cary Grant.

Storm Warning (1951 - b/w) - Seemingly typical B-rate noir, but then the climax is worth it. Doris Day and Ginger Rogers fighting a load of Klansmen in full hooded finery. Yes, really. Ronald Reagan's in it, too.
See also Julie (1956 - b/w) - a duff Day thriller.

Operation Pacific (1951 - b/w) - Forgettable John Wayne sub stuff.

Reunion in Reno (1951 - b/w)/The Lady Pays Off (1951 - b/w)/Week-End with Father (1951) - Interchangeable Uni kidflicks.

Retreat Hell (1951 - b/w) - I remember this on BBC2 when I was seven, and my mum being disappointed it was a Frank Lovejoy film, turning it off. It's nothing special. She was right.
See also Breakthrough (1950 -b/w) A Force of Arms (1951 - b/w, with Bill Holden), Bogie's Battle Circus (1953 - b/w, which makes it sound like a knockoff of It's A Knockout), Target Zero (1955 - b/w), Jump into Hell (1955 - b/w).

Go for Broke (1951 - b/w) - Documentary-esque Van Johnson-trains-Japanese-American-soldiers WW2er.

Up Front (1951 - b/w) - Forgettable comic strip adap comedy.

The Light Touch (1951 - b/w)  -Watchable art-theft story with Stewart Granger, Pier Angeli and George Sanders.

Carbine Williams (1952 - b/w) - James Stewart gun nonsense.

When in Rome (1952 - b/w) - Van Johnson is a priest in silly comedy-thriller.

Above and Beyond (1952 - b/w) - Robert Taylor aviation tedium.

Watch the Birdie (1952 - b/w)/The Great Diamond Robbery (1954  - b/w) - Red Skelton infuriates me.

Desperate Search (1952 - b/w) - Faux-Canadian wilderness tosh with Howard Keel.

Code Two (1953 - b/w) - Forgettable MGM police biker B-feature.

Plunder in the Sun (1953 - b/w) - Time-passing proto-Raiders with Glenn Ford and Francis L. Sullivan. Filmed at Churubusco and on location in Mexico, so at least its Mexican setting is authentic-looking.

South Seas Woman (1953 - b/w) - Burt Lancaster and Virginia Mayo in a marine-themed sexy comedy.
See also Errol Flynn in Mara Maru (1953 - b/w).

Blowing Wild (1953) - Another modern western about oil, with Gary Cooper.

Duffy of San Quentin (1954 - b/w) - Bland prison film with Louis Hayward.

Murder is my Beat (1955- b/w) - Edgar Ulmer helps make this Allied Artists Michael Shayne pic at least feel like a Warner Brothers cheapie.

Island of Lost Women (1959 - b/w) - Forgettable mad science exploitation.

Something of Value (1957 - b/w) - Preachy African odyssey despite good performances from Sidney Poitier and William Marshall.

The Green Eyed Blonde (1957 - b/w) - Forgettable reform school exploitation written by Dalton Trumbo.

The Fuzzy Pink Nightgown (1957 - b/w) - Forgettable Jane Russell comedy.

Damn Yankees (1958) -Chintzy baseball musical.

The Beat Generation  (1958 - b/w) - Another tiresome all-star teen exploitation tirade from Al Zugsmith.

The Naked Maja (1958) - Bland Italian-made Goya biopic with Ava Gardner and Anthony Franciosa.

Underwater Warrior (1958 - b/w)  - Forgettable Dan Dailey naval action.

Onionhead (1958 - b/w)/No Time for Sergeants (1959 - b/w) - I don't find Andy Griffith funny at all. I think he was a brilliant serious actor, but he always seems threatening. He's a great heavy trapped in the form of a comic lead. There's a bit in Onionhead where his head is shaven, and he looks like Lex Luthor.

I Want to Live (1958  - b/w) - A typical efficient but predictable women's picture.

Cry Terror (1958 - b/w) - Turgid James Mason airline thriller.

Middle of the Night (1959 - b/w) - Fredric March and Kim Novak in tiring relationship drama.

This Earth is Mine (1959) - Dreary winery drama.

Tuesday 24 March 2020


Union Station (1950 - b/w) - Generic noir, but a sinister turn from Barry Fitzgerald.
See also another Bill Holden noir, The Turning Point (1952 - b/w), and No Man of Her Own (1950 - b/w), Dark City (1950 - b/w), The Atomic City (1952 - b/w), Witness to Murder (1954 - b/w), Short Cut to Hell (1957 - b/w), The Scarlet Hour (1956 - b/w).

Riding High (1950 - b/w) - Bing Crosby works a horse to death, and seems pretty chipper about it. Clarence Muse is fun. He doesn't seem as stereotyped as some of his peers. He brings gravitas to the part. He's hamming it up, but in a theatrical way, not in a "black drama school" way.

Thief of Venice (1950 - b/w) - Italian Maria Montez nonsense. Horribly shot.

Bright Leaf (1950 - b/w) - A barely disguised western with Gary Cooper and Lauren Bacall and Pat Neal discussing tobacco.

For Heaven's Sake (1950 - b/w) - Mr. Belvedere is an angel in the west.

You're in the Navy Now (1951 - b/w) - Bland Gary Cooper vehicle.

The Model and The Marriage Broker (1951 - b/w) - Another tiresome Jeanne Crain vehicle.

The Mating Season (1951 - b/w) - Forgettable Gene Tierney comedy.

Dear Brat (1951 - b/w) - Bland comedy with Billy De Wolfe and Natalie Wood.

The Frogmen (1951 - b/w) - More naval nonsense, with Richard Widmark.
See also The Glory Boys (1953 - b/w), with Victor Mature, and In Love and War (1958).

Elopement (1951- b/w)/Dreamboat (1952 - b/w)/Holiday for Lovers (1959) - Basically the same Clifton Webb film with different settings. Also reminded that I had a crush age 9 on a girl with cerebral palsy who looked like Anne Francis.

Night Without Sleep (1952 - b/w) - Bland Roy Ward Baker noir.
See also The Steel Trap (1952 - b/w), A Blueprint for Murder (1953 - b/w), Dangerous Crossing (1953 - b/w), Vicki (1953 - b/w),  A Life in the Balance (1955 - b/w), The Way to the Gold (1957 - b/w), and populist war pics Three Came Home (1950 - b/w) and Decision Before Dawn (1951 - b/w).

My Pal Gus (1952 - b/w) - Another forgettable romcom, with Richard Widmark.

Off Limits (1953 - b/w) - Charmless Mickey Rooney and Bob Hope military buddy comedy.

It Happens Every Thursday (1953 - b/w) - Forgettable John Forsythe-Loretta Young vehicle.

I, The Jury (1953 - b/w) Directed by a George White, this is a poverty-row Mike Hammer. The highlight is Elisha Cook as Santa. Followed by Kiss Me Deadly and an even lesser version of My Gun is Quick (1957 - b/w).

Alaska Seas (1954 - b/w) - Rubbishy Arctic fishing nonsense.

Angela (1954 - b/w) - Rubbishy Italian noir with Dennis O'Keefe and Rossano Brazzi.

Seven Cities of Gold (1955) - Another Aztec saga. Michael Rennie a convincing monk.

I Died A Thousand Times (1955) - Jack Palance and Shelley Winters do High Sierra as a modern western. Instead of Willie Best, the annoying racial stereotype is changed to Mexican, so we get Pedro Gonzalez Gonzalez, and Lon Chaney Jr turns up.

Sincerely Yours (1955) - Liberace with his old face (he looks like a Yugoslavian grandmother) tries to convince he is straight, and a straight actor too. But it's Liberace. He's the walking essence of camp. Seeing him charmlessly romance Joanne Dru. Has a copy of Variety.

Pete Kelly's Blues (1955) - It looks and sounds great, but this Jack Webb passion project never gels.

Helen of Troy (1955) - Unexciting peplum nonsense, with the blandly attractive Rosanna Podesta.

Rebel Without a Cause (1955) - James Dean annoys me. He screams petulance. Poor Sal Mineo.

A Prize of Gold (1955) - Richard Widmark in a bubble-car against shoddy rear projection of Germany. This is Warwick, but instead of Anthony Newley, you have George Cole. Thank god. Some nice old Guinness posters too. But a typical post-war British thriller. Going over the Third Man again.

The Seven Year Itch (1955)/Bus Stop (1956) - I don't get Marilyn Monroe. Sorry. I prefer her in support in films such as Monty Woolley's As Young As You Feel (1951). Maybe, she works better in B/W. But Love Nest (1951 - b/w) and Let's Make It Legal (1951 - costarring fellow conspiracy theory magnet Robert Wagner) disprove this.

Toward the Unknown (1956) - Another dry story about aircraft.
See also The McConnell Story (1955) and Gary Cooper in the non-Eastenders-or-country music-related The Court Martial of Billy Mitchell (1955).

The Long Gray Line (1955) - Boring military school story about a teacher, played by Tyrone Power. The teacher is Marty Maher from Roscrea, Tipperary, a real figure. Power is ludicrous in his flat cap and trenchcoat, in his initial scenes as the Culchie.

The Proud and the Profane (1956 - b/w) - Forgettable war romance with Deborah Kerr and William Holden.
See also That Kind of Woman (1959 - b/w), the juvenile equivalent with the odd couple of Sophia Loren and Tab Hunter, plus Jack Warden and George Sanders.

The Three Faces of Eve (1957 - b/w) - Joanne Woodward moans to Joanne Woodward who moans to Lee J Cobb. Alistair Cooke hosts, and god, he is almost exactly Joe Flaherty's impression on SCTV.

Band of Angels (1957) - Clark Gable and Sidney Poitier fight in this overlong, tedious Civil War odyssey while Yvonne de Carlo moans that she has black blood.

The Violators (1957 - b/w) - Clearly a TV pilot, with star Arthur O'Connell, director John Newland and its New York locations.

Marjorie Morningstar (1958) - Tiring romance about musical theatre and Gene Kelly falling in love with Natalie Wood.

Tank Force (1958) - So generic this Warwick picture is that I'd sworn I'd logged it here already.
See also the Warwick Doctor in the House-in-the-Air-Force-esque High Flight (1957) with Tony bloody Newley. There's even a comedy drag ballet.

Indiscreet (1958) - Back when Piccadilly Circus shouted "Bovril", a typical genteel comedy with Cary Grant and Ingrid Bergman (see also Elena et les Hommes (1956) for more Bergman of this era).

Girls on The Loose (1958 - b/w)/Live Fast, Die Young (1959 - b/w) - Juvenile dreadfulness.
Not to be confused with the also-from-Universal Four Girls in Town (1957), which is just as bad, but has a copy of Variety.  Star Marianne Cook is actually German actress Marianne Koch, though she'd go under that name when she'd appear in A Fistful of Dollars.

The Prince and the Showgirl (1958)  - Typical Marilyn vehicle, but in England.

When Hell Broke Loose (1958 - b/w) - Grim war film with Charles Bronson.

FRAULEIN (1958) - Alongside the Blue Angel, another faux-German post-war saga from Fox.

The Little Savage (1959 - b/w) - Tired Lippert-produced pirate island tosh.
See also The Women of Pitcairn Island (1956 - b/w).

A Time To Love And A Time to Die (1959) - Sumptuous wartime melodrama from Universal. Helps by being shot in Germany, with the likes of Klaus Kinski popping up.

The Best of Everything (1959) - Feminist bonkbuster with Joan Crawford and Stephen Boyd.
See also other Fox melodramas like On The Threshold of Space (1955), Kirk Douglas in the Racers (1955), Anthony Quinn in The Magnificent Matador (1955), Love is a Many Splendored Thing (1955 - Jennifer Jones silly as a Eurasian), Good Morning Miss Dove (1955), The Deep Blue Sea (1955 - Vivien Leigh and ad placement for Schweppes), The Revolt of Mamie Stover (1956), Hilda Crane (1956), The Bottom of the Bottle (1956 - which segues into a western), The Man in the Grey Flannel Suit (1956), The Long Hot Summer (1958), The Gift of Love (1958).

Up Periscope (1959) - James Garner stars in YET ANOTHER SUBMARINE FILM from the 50s.
See also The Naked and the Dead (1958) and The Deep Six (1958) and Submarine Command (1951 - b/w).

A Summer Place (1959) - Yes, and I didn't want to go there, but I did, and I still didn't want to go there. Slushy, and there's a reason why the only thing people remember is the theme.

It Happened To Jane (1949) - My mum's interest in Doris Day films instigated a dislike (bar the thrillers). This is no different.

Compulsion (1959 - b/w) - Well made, but rather dry, but the subject of Leopold/Loeb isn't a fun one.

The Mark (1961 - b/w) - Grim but well-made Irish-made paedophile drama set in Northern England, with Stuart Whitman, Rod Steiger getting his mouth around some kind of Geordie/Irish hybrid, and Maria Schell, and a Northern newspaper called the Northern Reporter, sponsored by Carlsberg.
Not to be confused with the Paul Newman military trial The Rack (1956 - b/w).

Looking for Love (1964) - Bland romcom with Jim Hutton and Connie Francis singing.

East of Sudan (1964) - Produced by Charles Schneer, this desert adventure feels like a Harryhausen movie or similar fantasy adventure with the fantasy elements cut out. Anthony Quayle, Sylvia Syms, Derek Fowlds, 12-year-old Jenny Agutter (looking like a junior Rita Tushingham cosplayer), and Johnny Sekka fight off African tribes. It needs a giant monster to work.

Goodbye Charlie (1964) - Idiotic Debbie Reynolds/Tony Curtis bodyswap.

Oggi, domani, dopodomani (1965) - Nonsensical three-part comedy with Marcello Mastroianni.

Cactus Flower (1970) - Walter Matthau/Ingrid Bergman/Goldie Hawn countercultural folderol.

Monday 23 March 2020


For Love or Money (1933 - b/w) - Forgettable Robert Donat vehicle.

Typhoon (1940) -  Paramount Dorothy Lamour tropicana. Samey, compared to her other films.  See also Aloma of the South Seas (1941) and Rainbow Island (1944).

Maryland (1940) - About horse-racing. So boring. Hattie McDaniel does the mammying.
See also Scudda Hoo, Scudda Hay (1948), The Homestretch (1947) and Home in Indiana (1944)  which is about posh American sulky racing. Willie Best does his "black drama school" acting.

Chad Hanna (1940) - Basically a western in the circus with Lamour and Henry Fonda.

Northwest Passage (1940) - Dreary colonial western with Spencer Tracy.

Virginia (1941) - Another colour melodrama, with Madeleine Carroll, Sterling Hayden and Fred MacMurray.

Blossoms in the Dust (1941) - Weepie with an orphanage, Greer Garson and Walter Pidgeon

Shores of Tripoli (1941) - Bland colour war propaganda with John Payne, Maureen O'Hara and Randolph Scott.
See also Salute to the Marines (1942), the same but with Wallace Beery and Keye Luke as a Filipino.

The Forest Rangers (1942) - Modern western with Fred MacMurray, Paulette Goddard and Susan Hayward.

Lady in the Dark (1944) - Peculiar musical. There's a fourth-wall breaking panto horse and Ginger Rogers looks like 80s Cilla Black.

An American Romance (1944) - Overlong, uninteresting story of Brian Donlevy becoming an industrialist.

The Story of Dr. Wassell (1944) - More military propaganda, with Gary Cooper nursing the troops of the Pacific.

National Velvet (1944) - Mickey Rooney is only slightly more convincing as an Englishman than as a Japanese neighbour. At least, his dad was from Glasgow. It's setting feels so ludicrous. Rural England by way of suburban California. Set in the late 20s but looks simultaneously like 1944 and 1904. The sequel, International Velvet (1978) which ditches Elizabeth Taylor for Nanette Newman, being a Bryan Forbes production feels much more realistic - with its 70s BBC crews, and Osmonds posters and Guardian readers and boxes of Kellogg's Corn Flakes. It also styles Tatum O'Neal like Princess Anne, and makes her a showjumper.

Cover Girl (1944) - Typical Rita Hayworth musical. With Gene Kelly playing his role from Xanadu, itself a remake of the slushy Hayworth vehicle Gone to Earth (1947).
Tonight and Every Night (1945) - Morale-boosting Hollywood Blitz-set Rita Hayworth vehicle.

A Song to Remember (1945) - Cornel Wilde is ludicrous as Chopin.

Yolanda and the Thief (1945) - Fred "Fred Stair" Astaire dances in a mythical South American state.

Born to Wed (1946) - Van Johnson-Esther Williams-Lucille Ball romcom.

Captain from Castille (1947) - Massive bloated epic about the discovery of Mexico, with Tyrone Power and Cesar Romero.

Reap the Wild Wind (1947) - Ray Milland, John Wayne, Raymond Massey amongst the cast of what feels like  a Republic  seafaring cheapie with a massive Paramount budget.

An Ideal Husband (1947) - Worthy but rather dull Korda adaptation of Wilde.

The Pearl (1947 - b/w) -  A discovery. It feels exciting, with a verve, rare for Mexican cinema, even with RKO money and Pedro Armendariz. A Steinbeck adap.

High Barbaree (1947 - b/w)  - Tropic thriller with Van Johnson and Thomas Mitchell, in a dry run for Glencannon.

Desert Fury (1947) - Lizabeth Scott is devastating in this otherwise boilerplate noir in color with the gormless John Hodiak and Burt Lancaster.

Apartment for Peggy (1948) - Romantic nonsense with William Holden.

The Swordsman (1948) - Faux-Scottish pish with Larry Parks.

The Loves of Carmen (1948) - Silly Spanish-set Rita Hayworth (seemingly channelling Maureen O'Hara) nonsense, with Glenn Ford in a ludicrous outfit.

The Prince of Thieves (1948)/Rogues of Sherwood Forest (1950) - More bland color Robin Hoods from Columbia.

That Lady in Ermine (1948) - Mittel-European Lubitsch operetta with Betty Grable, Cesar Romero and Douglas Fairbanks Jr.

Little Women (1949) - June Allyson feels miscast.

The Secret Garden (1949) - Oh so sentimental. Margaret O'Brien and Dean Stockwell aren't very English, but the film is stolen by Doncaster lad Brian Roper, as Dickon, the only Yorkshire thing about the film. Aged 19  playing roughly 10 or 12, but looking at least 14, he has a strange alien, elfin aura, like a cross between David Bennent and Jimmy Clitheroe, with a strong echo of the overaged schoolboys in Dennis Potter plays. And the Doncaster accent brings to mind Granville from Open All Hours. He later returned to the UK, reprised the role in a BBC version and then appeared with similarly aged schoolboys in the BBC Billy Bunter series.

Samson and Delilah (1949) - Marathon biblical antics.
See also The Egyptian (1954), which stars Edmund Purdom, but Victor Mature is credited first (well, first male, Jean Simmons is billed first overall), because he's the icon of this kind of genre.

Mother is a Freshman (1949) - Silly mother/daughter love triangle with Loretta Young and Van Johnson.

Cheaper by the Dozen (1950)/Belles On Their Toes (1952) - Slushy family comedies.
See also Take Care Of My Little Girl (1951).

Half Angel (1951) - Samey Joseph Cotten-Loretta Young romcom.

The Barefoot Mailman (1951) - Everglades western with Robert Cummings, Terry Moore and Arthur Shields very much doing his brother Barry Fitzgerald.

I'll See in You in my Dreams (1951) - Another story of opera, with Doris Day, Danny Thomas, a spinning Variety and Count John McCormack as a character.

Sound Off (1952) - Mickey Rooney vehicle. Utterly rote, written by Blake Edwards.

Scaramouche (1952) -  Ludicrous secret identity swashbuckling with Stewart Granger.

Halls of Montezuma (1951)/Red Skies of Montana (1952) - Serviceable, workmanlike Richard Widmark actioners.

Jack and the Beanstalk (1952) - Abbott and Costello farce. It has a charming panto look.

Wait Till the Sun Shines, Nellie (1952) - Tiresome Fox nostalgia about vaudeville and American life via a barber played by David Wayne.

The Will Rogers Story (1952) - There's a reason why Will Rogers Jr never eclipsed the success of his father. Another terrible post-Jolson Story biopic of a turn of the century showbiz legend, a la Man of a Thousand Faces, the Buster Keaton Story, the Eddie Cantor Story.

The Wild North (1952) - Stewart Granger treks along Canada. It looks nice, but it feels kinda empty.

The Prisoner of Zenda (1953) - Basically a colourisation with different actors, of the far less stiff (1937) version.

Our Girl Friday (1953) - Just remembered watching this blandly cheery British desert island comedy (also starring Kenneth More and George Cole) that my grandad called Joan Collins "Jane Collins".

Miss Robin Crusoe (1953) - Goofy exotica.

Diamond Queen (1953) - Dodgy exotica swashbuckler with Fernando Lamas and Arlene Dahl.

FORBIDDEN (1953 -B/W) - Sub-Casablanca in Macau with Tony Curtis.

The Long, Long Trailer (1953) - Lucy and Desi annoy each other with a caravan, and prototype the end of the Italian Job.

Treasure of the Golden Condor (1953) - Rote swashbuckler with little swashbuckling, Cornel Wilde gloats.

The High and the Mighty (1954) - John Wayne does Airplane. But nowhere near fun, despite Roberts Stack and Newton. It's way too long. And fails to interest.

Woman's World (1954) - All-star women's picture.

The River Girl (1954) - Sophia Loren rustic drama, written by Pasolini.

A Bullet is Waiting (1954) - Jean Simmons and Rory Calhoun in a modern-set western. Seems quite gritty, then Brian Aherne turns up, resolves everything, and everyone jumps into a jeep with a dog named Shep and drives into the sunset, smiles on everyone's faces.

Queen of Babylon (1954) - Generic Italian peplum with Norman Stanley Fletcher favourite Rhonda Fleming.

Dragnet (1954) - Just an episode of the TV show, but longer and in colour. Not quite my thing, even though Jack Webb has a presence.

Pirates of Tripoli (1955) - Dodgy Sam Katzman exotica. See also Prince of Pirates (1950), The Magic Carpet (1951 - with Lucille Ball?!?), Mask of the Avenger (1951), Hurricane Island (1951), Captain Pirate (1952), Siren of Bagdad (1953), Slaves of Babylon (1953), Serpent of the Nile (1953 - homoerotic overtones with Raymond Burr's Marc Antony), Prisoners of the Casbah (1953), Charge of the Lancers (1954), Drums of Tahiti (1954), the Iron Glove (1954 - starring Robert Stack as an Irish Jacobite named Wogan), and non-Katzman lookalikes; Monogram/Allied Artists' Aladdin and His Lamp (1952) and The Adventures of Hajji Baba (1954 - John Derek riding around, with a ridiculous Nat King Cole-sung theme that's constantly played), and Fox's Lady in the Iron Mask (1952).

Interrupted Melody (1955) - Eleanor Parker mimes to opera in faux-Australia while Glenn Ford and Roger Moore with a tache look on.

Kismet (1955) - Lush Arabian Nights musicalia.

War and Peace (1956) - Zzzzz. Herbert Lom's Napoleon is surely a distant relative of Insp. Dreyfuss.
See also De Laurentiis' own cash-in, Tempest (1958).

Enchanted Island (1958) - Typical tropical nonsense with Dana Andrews fighting off cannibals.

The Geisha Boy (1958) - Mawkish nonsense with Jerry Lewis and a Japanese orphan.

Edge of Eternity (1959) - Generic though efficient Don Siegel-helmed desert noir with Cornel Wilde.

The Flying Fontaines (1959) - Terrible circus film with Michael Callan.

Queen of Pirates (1960) - Italian pirate nonsense with Gianna Maria Canale.

The Tartars (1961) - Orson Welles chews the scenery in a forgettable Italian cash-in on the Vikings.

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse (1962) - Overlong, dreary though visually lush remake of the old silent, with Glenn Ford miscast as Valentino.

Siege of the Saxons (1963) - Dopey medieval Arthurian/Robin Hood hybrid, though nice to see Jerome Willis and Francis de Wolff in big starring roles with their own "you have been watching" footage-credits. Janette Scott looks like her mum Thora Hird.

Bedtime Story (1964) - The sub-par prototype for Dirty Rotten Scoundrels.

Sunday 22 March 2020


Kismet (1944) - Arabian nights tosh with Ronald Colman and Marlene Dietrich.

Smooth as Silk  (1946 - B/W) B-noir from Universal, undistinguished, with Kent Taylor.

Inside Job (1946 - b/w) - Boring B-thriller with Preston Foster.

A Stolen Life (1946 - b/w) - Double the melodrama with Bette Davis.

She Wrote the Book (1946 - b/w) - Unmemorable comedy with Joan Davis and Ava Gardner.

White Tie and Tails (1946 - b/w) - Forgettable comedy of manners with Dan Duryea.

Girl on the Spot (1946 - b/w) - Forgettable crime musical by William Beaudine, with TV's Count of Monte Cristo, and father of Mickey, George Dolenz.

So Goes My Love (1946 - b/w) - Forgettable western comedy with a slightly too old Myrna Loy, Don Ameche and doomed Disney Peter Pan/Jim Hawkins Bobby Driscoll.

Time Out of Mind (1947 - b/w) - Faux-Gainsborough New England melodrama with Phyllis Calvert and Robert Hutton, both of whom would leave Hollywood for England, Calvert on her way back home, and Hutton ended up as a C-list American support in British horror.

Take One False Step (1948 - b/w) - Suburban B-noir with Shelley Winters and an older William Powell, now resembling Captain Peacock.

Family Honeymoon (1948 - b/w) - Fred MacMurray and Claudette Colbert family com.

You Gotta Stay Happy (1948- b/w) Airborne war-rom-com with Joan Fontaine, James Stewart and Eddie Albert before his hair went white.

Free For All (1949 - b/w) - Bland Washington comedy with Robert Cummings.

Once More, My Darling (1949 - b/w) - At least, Ann Blyth rocks a T-shirt. Robert Montgomery is like an oak.

The Lady Gambles (1949 - b/w) - Barbara Stanwyck-Robert Preston-"Anthony Curtis" melodrama.

The Night Unto Night (1949 - b/w) - Tropical noir gubbins with Viveca Lindfors and Ronald Reagan.

Dynamite (1949 - b/w) - Bland Paramount B with William Gargan blowing things up. Not exciting.
See also Special Agent (1949 - b/w) with William Eythe, and The Lawless (1950).

Under My Skin (1950 - b/w) - John Garfield is a jockey.

Francis (1950 - b/w) - Tiresome vehicle with Donald O'Connor and his donkey.  John McIntire has a somewhat Wellesian presence in some scenes.
See also the Milkman (1950 - b/w) and Yes, Sir That's My Baby (1949 - b/w).

The Happy Years (1950) - Even now, Dean Stockwell seems so modern, he seems ludicrous in Victorian gear.

Pagan Love Song (1950) - Typical MGM musical with Esther Williams and Howard Keel, and lots of browned up dancers in its tiki-esque tropical island artifice.

Under the Gun (1951 - b/w) - Richard Conte trudges through the everglades and in jail.
See also the Sleeping City (1950 - b/w) and the Raging Tide (1951 - b/w).

The Law and the Lady (1951 - b/w) - Forgettable Greer Garson period comedy.

Shakedown (1951 - b/w)  - Undistinguished B-noir with Howard Duff.
See also Abandoned (1949 - b/w - with "Roc Hudson"), Damn Citizen (1958 - b/w), I Was a Shoplifter (1950 - b/w), Undertow (1949 - b/w), Manhandled (1949 - b/w), The Accused (1949 - b/w), Illegal Entry (1949 - b/w), Woman on the Run (1950 - b/w), Outside the Wall (1950 - b/w) with Richard Basehart, Woman in Hiding (1950 - b/w) with Ida Lupino  and with Duff, Johnny Stool-Pigeon (1949 - b/w), which at least has a  nice folksy-sinister turn from John McIntire.

Air Cadet (1951 - b/w)/Bright Victory (1951 - b/w) - Rock Hudson in the military, though it's more Arthur Kennedy in the latter.

Journey Into Light (1951 - b/w) - Feels familiar. Sterling Hayden as a priest.

Quebec (1951) - It's terrible. Shot in Quebec, but both leads, Corinne Calvet and John  Barrymore Jr/Drew Barrymore Sr are awful.

Bronco Buster (1952) - Modern B-western about rodeos.

No Room for the Groom (1952 - b/w) - Piper Laurie and Tony Curtis romcom.

Flesh and Fury (1952 - b/w) - Another Universal boxing-B with Tony Curtis.

Here Come the Nelsons (1952 - b/w) - A pilot for the Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet. Added  Rock Hudson.

Has Anybody Seen My Gal (1952) - Rote Rock Hudson family comedy.

Because of You (1952 - b/w) - Nondescript melodrama with Loretta Young and Jeff Chandler.

The Golden Hawk (1952) - Sam Katzman pirate potboiler with Sterling Hayden.

Aaron Slick from Punkin Creek (1952) - Annoying hillbilly musical with Dinah Shore and Alan Young, who in this is as annoying as he was as 7-Zark-7.

Take the High Ground! (1953) - Military training boredom with Richard Widmark and Karl Malden.

Girls of Pleasure Island (1953) - Bland tropical comedy with Don Taylor and Leo Genn.

Girls in the Night  (1953 - b/w) - Forgettable JD noir.

Houdini (1953) - Actually quite fun. Tony Curtis has a role that suits him. But it's George Pal, so of course, it's fun.

Count the Hours (1953 - b/w) - Rural noir with Teresa Wright.

Her Twelve Men (1954) - Greer Garson teaches some winsome child actors.

Elephant Walk (1954) - Despite Elizabeth Taylor and Peter Finch, this Paramount adventure in Sri Lanka is a Pine-Thomas production in all but name.

Casanova's Big Night (1954) - Bob Hope lollops about Venice, with Joan Fontaine at his side.

Deep in My Heart (1954) - 2 hour musical variety show with a cast of stars.

Jivaro (1954) - Pine-Thomas jungle adventure. With Lon Chaney, Brian Keith and Brazilian princess Rita Moreno.  Not to be confused with the Australian/New Guinea-set Crosswinds (1951 - b/w), which is almost identical, or Captain China (1950 - b/w).

Rose Marie (1954) - Faux-Canadian spectacle with a soundtrack beloved of aul wans. Here, it's Howard "Harold" Keel, though fans of Slim Whitman will know all the hits. It's also the origin of Indian Love Call, humanity's greatest defence of Martians. It looks nice. But light operetta gives me a headache.

Lucy Gallant (1955) - Jane Wyman alleged romance with Charlton Heston.

It's A Dog's Life (1955) - Actually quite sweet story about a bull terrier in the Bowery.

The Far Horizons (1955) - Donna Reed's brownface as Sacajawea looks like bad old age makeup. MacMurray and Heston are Lewis and Clark.

The Scarlet Coat (1955) - Colonial America tosh with Cornel Wilde and George Sanders.

The Glass Slipper (1955) - Leslie Caron is Cinders. Estelle Winwood is her lusty possibly-lesbian godmother. Otherwise basic MGM musical.

Seven Little Foys (1955) - Typical musical.

You're Never Too Young (1955) - Oh god, Jerry Lewis infuriates me. See also Artists and Models (1955).

The King's Thief (1955)/Diane (1956) - MGM costume tosh with decent casts, headed in both cases by Lana Turner, supported in both by Roger Moore.

Forever Darling (1956) - Big-screen tedium with Lucy and Desi.

Tea and Sympathy (1956) - Overaged teen John Kerr seeks help with Deborah Kerr.

The Teahouse of the August Moon (1956) - Apparently, this was intended as a comedy, and Marlon Brando is hilarious. But I don't think his bizarre, supposedly Japanese but almost unrecognisable as anything Earthly greaser was intended as a joke.
See also Sayonara (1957) - same film except Brando is the American, and now the unconvincing Japanese man is a grimacing Ricardo Montalban.

Gaby (1956) - Tatty though expensive-looking yet simultaneously cheap-feeling Waterloo Bridge redo with a quite impressive recreation of wartime London, and Leslie Caron lusting over the wooden John Kerr.

The Barretts of Wimpole Street (1957) - Errzzzzz.

Les Girls (1957) - Has a lot of juicy fake Britishness. Newspapers with titles like Morning Globe and British Daily Tatler. A rare Hollywood venture for Leslie Phillips. But it's a typical A-grade Gene Kelly vehicle. Star Jacques Bergerac's name is French for John Nettles. Leslie Phillips never did a Bergerac, but he did do a Lovejoy.

Don't Go Near the Water (1957) - Asinine Glenn Ford naval commedy.

The Wings of Eagles (1957) - John Wayne learns to walk again, and decides to write. Maureen O'Hara looks on. Naval gubbins.

The Little Hut (1957) - Ava Gardner, David Niven and Stewart Granger squabble on an island.

Anna di Brooklyn (1957) - Gina Lollobrigida tempts  an Italian town, or something.

Tarzan's Fight for Life (1958) - Junky backlot-bound Gordon Scott venture. Woody Strode is a Mohawk, for some reason.

The Reluctant Debutante (1958) - Rex Harrison nonsense.

Some Came Running (1958) - Sinatra and Dino gloat. Shirley MacLaine gets fridged.

Gigi (1958) -See also Lili (1953).

Houseboat (1958)  - Bland Cary Grant/Loren vehicle.

Count Any Blessings (1958) - Silly Rossano Brazzi-Deborah Kerr comedy made in England, though with a mainly ex-pat Hollywood Brit cast plus Martin Stephens.

It Started with A Kiss (1959) - Spanish-set Glenn Ford/Debbie Reynolds romcom.

Ask Any Girl (1959) - Generic Shirley MacLaine vehicle.

The Trap (1959) - Basically a western set in modern era, with Richard Widmark, Lorne Greene, Tina Louise and Lee J. Cobb.

The Doctor's Dilemma (1959) - Not a Doctor film, despite Dirk Bogarde. A period comedy. At least, it has Alastair Sim.

L'Il Abner (1959) - It's very stylised, but rather grating. It lacks the Old Shmoo too.

The Mating Game (1959) - Debbie Reynolds with a Gloria Hunniford haircut plays Mariette. Tony Randall is Charley. Paul Douglas is Pop Larkin. That's right. It's the Darling Buds of May, moved to Kentucky. And it is awful. It's like the original H.E. Bates stories being raped. No wonder his son decided to adapt them himself decades later. Tony Randall later returned to appearing in bastardisations of beloved British characters later adapted by ITV in possibly-definitive versions in the 1990s, as Poirot.

Saturday 21 March 2020


Show Boat (1929 - b/w)/Show Boat (1936 - b/w) - The latter has some Whale verve.

Lady Tubbs (1935 - b/w) - Goofy railroad comedy.

Waterloo Bridge (1931 - b/w)/Waterloo Bridge (1940 - b/w) - Typical weepies.

Iron Man (1931 - b/w) - Lew Ayres boxes. See also Up For Murder (1931 - b/w).

My Pal the King (1932 - b/w) - Tm Mix babysits king Mickey Rooney of some mittel-European state. Not to be confused with King for a Night (1933 - b/w), another boxing story like The Prizefighter and the Lady (1933 - b/w) - Max Baer, Myrna Loy and Primo Carnera.

Tom Brown of Culver (1932 - b/w)/Spirit of Culver (1939 - b/w) - Dreary military school stories.

Scandal for Sale (1932 - b/w) - Timekilling journo yarn with Pat O'Brien.

Scarface (1932 - b/w) - Does in 90 minutes what De Palma failed to do in three hours.

Strictly Dishonorable (1932 - b/w) - Paul Lukas romcom.

Once in a Lifetime (1932 - b/w) - Forgettable Jack Oakie comedy.

Counsellor at Law (1933 - b/w) - John Barrymore legal yarn.

Saturday's Millions (1933 - b/w) - Robert Young and College football. Snore.

Moonlight and Pretzels (1933 - b/w) - Undistinguished musical with Leo Carrillo.

Only Yesterday (1933 - b/w) - Margaret Sullavan weepie.

The Kiss Before The Mirror (1933 - b/w) - Generic mystery/drama with Frank Morgan, Walter Pidgeon and Gloria Stuart.

Wake Up And Dream (1934 - b/w) - Forgettable musical.

Million Dollar Ransom (1934 - b/w) - B-mystery with Andy Devine reacting.

There's Always Tomorrow (1934 - b/w) - Tiring melodrama with Frank Morgan.  Remade in (1956) with Fred MacMurray and Barbara Stanwyck.

Little Man, What Now (1934 - b/w) - Tiring Borzage melodrama.

One More River (1934 - b/w) - Semi-convincingly British set Galsworthy adap.
See also By Candlelight (1933 - b/w), The Man Who Reclaimed His Head (1934 - b/w).

The Crosby Case (1934 - b/w) - Dreary Universal mystery.

The Good Fairy (1935 - b/w) - Well-made women's picture for Margaret Sullavan.

Rendezvous at Midnight (1935 - b/w) - Forgettable B-mystery with Ralph Bellamy.

Three Kids and a Queen (1935 - b/w) - Annoying kids accompany May Robson.

The Preview Murder Mystery (1936 - b/w) - Forgettable metathing with Reginald Denny.

The Sea Spoilers (1936 - b/w) - Forgettable naval saga with John Wayne.

A Girl with Ideas (1937-  b/w) - Bland comedy with Walter Pidgeon.

Top of the Town (1937 - b/w) - Bland musical with Doris Nolan, who later moved to the UK, and appeared in Emergency Ward 10. Just saw her yesterday in Juggernaut, as Clifton James' wife. Watch Juggernaut instead.

You're A Sweetheart (1937 - b/w) - Alice Faye sings. Andy Devine mugs.

One Hundred Men And A  Girl (1937 - b/w) - Deanna f***** Durbin.

Merry Go Round of 1938 (1937-b/w) - Rote variety show. Set in India.

Breezing Home (1937 - b/w)  Railroading roadtrip drama with horse racing and Binnie Barnes.

Little Tough Guy (1938 - b/w) - The Dead End Kids/Bowery Boys/whatever they're called.

Young Fugitives (1938 - b/w) - Civil War-commemorating crime nonsense.

Youth Takes A Fling (1938 - b/w) - Joel McCrea romcom.

Rage of Paris (1938 - b/w) - Bland romance with Danielle Darrieux and Douglas Fairbanks Jr, sumptuous design, though.

Danger on the Air (1938 - b/w) - Was sure I'd seen this Crime Club before. But no, it's so generic that you'd swear you had.

The Devil's Party (1938 - b/w) - Rote gangstering with Victor McLaglen.

I Stole A Million (1939 - b/w) - George Raft in a fedora.

When Tomorrow Comes (1939 - b/w) - Another Charles Boyer/Irene Dunne vehicle. Has Onslow Stevens and Fritz Feld.

Unexpected Father (1939 - b/w)  Baby Sandy is a useless lead.

The Sun Never Sets (1939 - b/w) - Colonial boredom with Douglas Fairbanks Jr and Basil Rathbone.

East Side of Heaven (1939 - b/w) - Another musical, with Bing Crosby.

Murder in the Blue Room (1944 - b/w) - A bland remake of a 30s horror, with added musical interludes.

Pirates of Monterey (1947) - Bland western in Mexico with Maria Montez in her last film for Universal.

The Countess of Monte Cristo (1948 - b/w) - Forgettable Sonja Henie musical.

Life of Riley (1949 - b/w) - Typical stodgy radio adaptation with William Bendix.

Story of Molly X (1949 - B/W) - Stodgy noir with June Havoc.

The Fighting O'Flynn (1949 - b/w) - Oirish swashbuckler, Little Europe as Dublin, with Douglas Fairbanks Jr versus Richard Greene.

Undercover Girl (1950 - b/w) - Dreary B-spy film with Scott Brayd, Richard Egan and Alexis Smith.

Louisa (1950 - b/w) - Forgettable comedy with Ronald Reagan.

Peggy (1950) - Forgettable teen comedy with Rock Hudson.

Steel Town (1952) - Western in oil drag. 

The Veils of Bagdad (1953) - Bland Arab adventure with Victor Mature.

The Golden Blade (1953) - Bland Arab adventure with Rock Hudson and Piper Laurie.

The Mississippi Gambler (1953) - Rote western with Tyrone Power and Piper Laurie.

The Glass Web (1953 - b/w) - Ludicrous melodrama set in a TV studio, with John Forsythe and Edward G. Robinson.

Walking My Baby Back Home (1953) - Forgettable musical with Donald O'Connor and Janet Leigh.

The Sign of the Pagan (1954) - Ludicrous Mongol saga with Jack Palance and Jeff Chandler.

Kiss Of Fire (1955)  - Basically a western in Spain with Jack Palance.

Female on the Beach (1955) - Dodgy Joan Crawford melodrama.

Lady Godiva of Coventry (1955) - Silly Maureen O'Hara medieval tosh.

Running Wild (1955 - b/w) - Good grief, another dreary JD film, with John Saxon.

So This is Paris (1955) - Generic musical with Tony Curtis.

The Unguarded Moment (1955) - Horrid little sexual harassment/JD thing with Esther Williams and John Saxon.

One Desire (1955) - Sumptuous but unexciting period drama with Anne Baxter and Rock Hudson.

Foxfire (1955) - Tiring melodrama with Jane Russell and Jeff Chandler as an Apache oilman.

The Looters (1955  - b/w) - Godawful modern western with Rory Calhoun.

The Shrike (1955) - Without a beard/tache, José Ferrer looks irritatingly gormless.

To Hell and Back (1955) - Interesting, overlong but interesting dramatisation of Audie Murphy's life, even though Audie isn't particularly convincing as himself.

Never Say Goodbye (1956) - Bland melodrama set partly in backlot mittel-Europe, with suburban heartache and Rock Hudson.

Price of Fear (1956 - b/w) - Merle Oberon sloppy noir.

Everything but the Truth (1956) - Goofy comedy with John Forsythe and Maureen O'Hara. A  redo of Her Adventurous Night (1946 - b/w).

World in my Corner (1956 - b/w) - Bland Audie Murphy boxing vehicle. See also The Square Jungle (1956 - b/w).

Away All Boats (1956) - Bland naval saga.

Mr. Cory (1957) - Dreary thriller with Tony Curtis. See also Six Bridges to Cross (1955).

Battle Hymn (1957) - Mawkish Korean war orphan melodrama with Rock Hudson and the Welsh/Indian-but-probably-not-actually-Desi Anna Kashfi.

The Tattered Dress (1957) - Stodgy noir with Jeff Chandler.

The Night Runner (1957) - Painful noir with George Nader.
See also The Man Afraid (1957 - b/w), Appointment with a Shadow (1957 - b/w), the Hollywood-set Female Animals (1957 - best of the bunch) and the Nader-free Behind the High Wall (1956 - b/w - not the Robert Taylor vehicle High Wall (1947 - b/w)), and Slaughter on Tenth Avenue (1957 - b/w) and Outside the Law (1956 - b/w).

My Man Godfrey (1957) - Bland remake with David Niven.

Voice in the Mirror (1958 - b/w) - Tiring Richard Egan alcohol drama.

Thursday 19 March 2020


Rain or Shine (1930 - b/w) - Goofy early Frank Capra in a carnival, with a forgettable cast.

Outside the Law (1930 - b/w) - Forgettable Edward G Robinson vehicle

Little Accident (1930)/(1939-b/w) - Silly comedy done twice, about a lost child. Though some derring stunts with Baby Sandy in the second.

King of Jazz (1930) - Goofy variety show in color, with an Uncanny Valley young Bing Crosby.

The Road to Reno (1931 - b/w) - Forgettable Paramount comedy.

Cavalcade (1933 - b/w) - Another Hollywood melodrama set in the English music hall, though points for having actual British child-of-music hall Dick Henderson Jr, later comedian Dickie Henderson as a boy actor, like Hughie Green, another British boy actor in Hollywood brought back home as a freakish Mid-Atlantic light entertainer.

The Big Cage (1933 - b/w) - Generic circus ramblings with Clyde Beatty and Mickey Rooney.

Imitation of Life (1934 - b/w) - The 1959 version has better performances. This, despite an African-American (opposed to a  Mexican) as Sarah Jane, in Fredi Washington, it's not aged well.
See also Magnificent Obsession (1935 - b/w).

Twentieth Century (1934 - b/w) - Undistinguished 30s comedy with John Barrymore and Carole Lombard, from Howard Hawks.
See also Lombard in Lady by Choice (1934 - b/w) and True Confession (1937 - b/w).

Carnival (1935 - b/w) -Undistinguished comedy from Columbia with Jimmy Durante and Lucille Ball. Fun puppets, though.

If You Could Only Cook (1935 - b/w) - Typical early B-screwball. See also Too Many Husbands (1940 - b/w), also with Jean Arthur, and Public Menace (1935 - b/w).

Fighting Youth (1935 - b/w) - Universal college comedy nonsense.

Next Time We Love (1936 - b/w) - James Stewart and his Welsh counterpart, Ray Milland -together in the flesh.

Love Before Breakfast (1936 - b/w) - Another interchangeable Carole Lombard vehicle.

The King Steps Out (1936 - b/w)  -Another light operatic Ruritanian musical, with Grace Moore and Franchot Tone, by Von Sternberg. 

The Magnificent Brute (1936 - b/w) - Wrestling picture (Yes, it's a proper genre) with Victor McLaglen.

Panic on the Air (1936 - b/w) - Forgettable thriller with Lew Ayres. Interchangeable with a dozen similar radio peril films.

California Straight Ahead (1937 - b/w) - Forgettable John Wayne trucker opera.

Girls' School (1938 - b/w) - 30s Columbia prom comedy.

The Lady and the Mob (1939 - b/w) - One joke Columbia B-comedy.

The Real Glory (1939 - b/w) - Cheerful tropicana with Gary Cooper and David Niven.

There's Always A Woman (1938 - b/w)/Good Girls Go to Paris (1939 - b/w)/The Amazing Mr. Williams (1939 - b/w) - Melvyn Douglas and Joan Blondell vehicles. Interchangeable.
See also He Stayed for Breakfast (1940 - b/w) and So They Were Married (1936 - b/w), There's That Woman Again (1938 - b/w, with Virginia Bruce). 

The Family Next Door (1939 - b/w) - Forgettable proto-sitcom family "fun" with Hugh Herbert.

Rio (1939 - b/w) - Forgettable story about beach bums that is not the proto-noir you'd think, with Basil Rathbone.

Beware Spooks (1939 - b/w) - At least Joe E Brown has a fun chase through a funhouse.

Zenobia (1939 - b/w) - Problematic colonial comedy with black servant "comic relief" that is lifted, because it has Oliver Hardy in it.

Boys from Syracuse (1940-  b/w) - Forgettable Roman slapstick.

Three Faces West (1940 - b/w) - Strange western/anti-Nazi immigration drama with John Wayne and Charles Coburn, from Republic.

Oh, Johnny How Can You Love! (1940 - b/w) - Forgettable B-romcom from Universal.

Fisherman's Wharf (1940 - b/w) - Forgettable vehicle for boy soprano Bobby Breen.

Seven Sinners (1940 - b/w) - Lively John Wayne western set at South Seas, with Marlene Dietrich.

Hired Wife (1940 - b/w) - Rosalind Russell romances Brian Aherne. Forgettable.

World Premiere (1941 - b/w) - Forgettable Paramount full-length ad.

Unfinished Business (1941 - b/w)  - Forgettable Irene Dunne//Robert Montgomery vehicle.

Appointment with Love (1941 - b/w) - Forgettable Romance with Charles Boyer and Margaret Sullavan, made back to back with their version of Back Street.

The Man Who Lost Himself (1941 - b/w) - Forgettable remake of Kay Francis' Strangers in Love (1932 - b/w), again with Francis but Brian Aherne instead of Fredric March.

Model Wife (1941 - b/w) - Forgettable Dick Powell comedy.

South of Tahiti (1941 - b/w) - Brian Donlevy becomes a tropical queen or something in this ludicrous Universal tropic island tosh that launched Maria Montez. Andy Devine reacts.

The Lady from Cheyenne (1941 - b/w) - Forgettable comic western with Robert Preston and Loretta Young.

The Wife Takes A Flyer (1942 - b/w) - Forgettable wartime comedy with Franchot Tone and Joan Bennett.

Butch Minds the Baby (1942 - b/w) - Broderick Crawford in an entertaining if forgettable Runyon flick.

Paris Calling (1942 - b/w) - Tedious wartime melodrama with Elisabeth Bergner and Basil Rathbone.

Lady in a Jam (1942 - b/w) - Irene Dunne in a peculiar screwball comedy that suddenly turns into a western.
The William Powell vehicle The Senator was Indiscreet (1947 - b/w) goes the other way.

North to the Klondike (1942 - b/w) - Roughshod Northern with Lon Chaney Jr.

We've Never Been Licked (1943 - b/w)  -Forgettable propaganda starring Richard Quine, who doesn't register on screen, and he knew it, so he became a director.

Chip Off The Old Block (1944 - b/w) - Naval musical with the odious Donald O'Connor. See also Patrick the Great (1945 - b/w).

Ladies Courageous (1944 - b/w)  - Forgettable women's air comedy with Loretta Young and Geraldine Fitzgerald.

Bowery to Broadway (1944 - b/w) - More Maria Montez, but a B/W musical. I've become sick of light operatics.

Calling Dr. Death (1943 - b/w)/Pillow of Death (1945 - b/w) - Ropey Inner Sanctum featurette.  Lon Chaney Jr. is a ludicrous choice as leading man.

Gung Ho (1943 - b/w) - One is Canadian, one is set in the East, one has Barry Fitzgerald, the other has Bob Mitchum. But these two Universal Randolph Scott flicks are two sides of the same coin.

The Strange Death of Adolf Hitler (1943 - b/w) - Odd, amateurish Universal mondo-esque propaganda.

Gyspy Wildcat (1944) - Actually quite nice-looking but ludicrous Maria Montez yarn.

This Love of Ours (1945 - b/w) - Slush with Claude Rains and Merle Oberon.

See My Lawyer (1945 - b/w) - The only highlight of this Olsen/Johnson vehicle are musicians dressed as Ainsley Harriott.

The Runaround (1946 - b/w) - Exactly what it says, with Rod Cameron and Broderick Crawford.

Danger Woman (1946 - b/w) - Forgettable Universal B-thriller, that I was sure I had seen before.

The Egg and I (1947 - b/w) - Well-made but baffling rural comedy that spawned Ma and Pa Kettle.

Fighter Squadron (1948 - b/w) - Forgettable US air combat set in "Herfordshire" with Robert Stack.

Larceny (1948 - b/w) - Bland noir with John Payne.

Another Part of the Forest (1948 - b/w) - Flaccid Universal Alabama-set post-Civil War melodrama with Fredric March.

Mystery Submarine (1950 - b/w) - Bland MacDonald Carey military vehicle.

Hollywood Story (1951  - b/w) - Richard Conte in bland William Castle-helmed noir.

Iron Man (1951 - b/w) - Serviceable boxing tale with Jeff Chandler.

Katie Did It (1951 - b/w) - Forgettable comedy with Ann Blyth and Mark Stevens.

The Groom Wore Spurs (1951 - b/w) - Bland romcom/western with Ginger Rogers and Jack Carson.

The Mob (1951 - b/w) - Broderick Crawford crawls. Noir that manages to evoke a nice setting.

Caribbean (1952) - Colourful but generic pirate movie with John Payne.
See also Yankee Buccaneer (1952), Buccaneer's Girl (1950), South Seas Sinner (1950 - b/w, which I thought I'd seen, but no, only the SCTV parody), the interchangeable duo of Son of Ali Baba (1952)/The Prince Who Was A Thief (1951) - both with Tony Curtis and Piper Laurie, Little Egypt (1951), Scarlet Angel (1952), The Desert Hawk (1950), Double Crossbones (1950).

A Man for All Seasons (1966) - Well-made but getting deja vu. Despite the sterling cast, it feels not too different from any other Tudor epic.

The Music Lovers (1969) - Don't really care for Ken Russell's biopics. See also Savage Messiah (1972).

Can Hieronymus Merkin Ever Forget Mercy Humppe and Find True Happiness (1969)  - A horrible self-indulgent, pervy mess from Newley.

The Boy Friend (1971) - Typical MGM musical but with added Barbara Windsor and Brian Murphy.

Lady Caroline Lamb (1972) - Robert Bolt tries to make a Ken Russell film, but too much boredom gets in the way.

The Tempter (1974) - High-class nunsploitation with Glenda Jackson, MP.

Star Odyssey (1978) - Tatty but somewhat admirably ambitious post-Star Wars nonsense with suicidal Jewish duck robots with Star of David antennae, Gianni Garko, sub-Space 1999 design and

Lucky (2013) - Harry Dean Stanton wanders about. It's sweet but inconsequential.

Tuesday 17 March 2020


Wings (1927 - b/w) - The over-sentimentalised modern soundtrack grates.

Anna Christie (1930 - b/w) - Decently made, though the same film Garbo always made.

Trader Horn (1931 - b/w) - Godawful racist bullshit. Remade as the silly, sub-TV movie Trader Horn (1973), with Rod Taylor.

The Bad Sister (1931 - b/w) - Forgettable Bette Davis semi-feature.

Flesh (1932) - The Wallace Beery wrestling picture. Not very good.

Babes in Toyland (1934 - b/w) - Laurel and Hardy in fairytale land.

Black Fury (1935 - b/w) - Not an adventure but Paul Muni is a miner.

Break of Hearts (1935 - b/w) - Forgettable romance between Katharine Hepburn and Charles Boyer.

Blackmailer (1936 - b/w) - Forgettable B with William Gargan.

As You Like It (1936 - b/w) - Stagey, almost fairytale-like Shakespeare with a twinky Oliver.

The Final Hour (1936 - b/w) - Forgettable Ralph Bellamy cheapie I could have sworn I'd seen before.

The Awful Truth (1937  - b/w) - The kind of screwballer that passes through me.

Big City (1937 - b/w) - Inner-city melodrama with Luise Rainer and Spencer Tracy.

Black Legion (1937 - b/w) - The novelty of this Bogie gangster B is that it has Klan hoods instead of fedoras.

The Drum (1938) - Typical story of colonial derring-do and brownface.

Adventures of Tom Sawyer (1938) - Serviceable, colourful adaptation.

Beau Geste (1939 - b/w) - Typical desert action. But then, this is the template to all desert adventures.

The Women (1939 - b/w) - The ultimate women's picture. Kinda repetitive.

Bachelor Mother (1939 - b/w) - David Niven and Ginger Rogers in typical screwballing. See also 5th Avenue Girl (1939 - b/w).

Mr. Skeffington (1944 - b/w) - Bette Davis period tosh.

Blood and Sand (1941) - Sumptuously mounted Spanish bullfighting cobblers with a fine cast - Tyrone Power, Linda Darnell, Rita Hayworth, Alla Nazimova, Anthony Quinn, J. Carrol Naish, John Carradine...

A Woman's Face (1941 - b/w) - Joan Crawford melodrama.

Ball of Fire (1941 - b/w) - Typical screwballer with Gary Cooper, Barbara Stanwyck and Dana Andrews.

Woman of the Year  (1942 - b/w) - Typical Tracy/Hepburn romcom.

Lady Gangster (1942 - b/w) - Forgettable Warner quickie.

The Big Street (-1942 - b/w) - Typical romantic drama with Henry Fonda and Lucille Ball.

The Princess and the Pirate (1944) - Bland Bob Hope antics. Making the same film again.

Bataan (1943 - b/w)/Back to Bataan (1945 - b/w) - Samey WW2 propaganda. Basically two halves of the same film.

Brewster's Millions (1945 - b/w) - Forgettable adaptation.

A Walk in the Sun (1945 - b/w) - Dana Andrews, John Ireland, Lloyd Bridges, Norman Lloyd, Richard Conte go to war.

Anchors Aweigh! (1945)/On The Town (1949) - The thing about these films, is that despite all the dancing magic, the most amazing thing is the shape of Frank Sinatra's head. As someone noted on Cookdandbombd.co.uk, like Jimmy Greaves, his head changed shape as he got older. Even in the four years between the two films, Sinatra's head looks to quote Reeves and Mortimer, "slightly different!".

The Guilt of Janet Ames (1947 - b/w) - Endearingly weird Rosalind Russell noir, almost like hallucinating, halfway between a noir and a variety show including a debuting standup named Sid Caesar.

Fiesta (1947)/Holiday in Mexico (1947) - Two sides of the same coin. One has Ricardo Montalban, the other Roddy McDowall. Both have Hugo Haas. 

The Bachelor and the Bobby-Soxer (1947 - b/w) - Cary Grant deals with Shirley Temple, who is still trying to look cute as a nineteen year old but looks ridiculous. See also That Hagen Girl (1947 - b/w).

No Minor Vices (1948 - b/w) - Bland Dana Andrews-Lilli Palmer-Louis Jourdan comedy.

The Winslow Boy (1948 - b/w)/The Browning Version (1951 - b/w) - Still can't differentiate them. Both star Hitchcock British leads (Redgrave, Donat), both have surnames in the title, both about schoolboys.

The Three Musketeers (1948) - Brash, colourful adaptation - with an incredible cast. It's nothing real special, just a decent adaptation of the tale, even though I'm not really interested in the Musketeers.

The Adventures of Don Juan (1948) - Errol Flynn still in his prime, roughly. The theme unfortunately I cannot disassociate from its use in the Goonies.

Sitting Pretty (1948 - b/w)/Mr. Belvedere Goes to College (1949 - b/w)/Mr. Belvedere Rings the Bell (1951 - b/w) - Clifton Webb makes the same film again. The first has Maureen O'Hara and Richard Haydn. Later spawned a US kidcom.

A Foreign Affair (1948 - b/w) - Bland foreign wartime nonsense with Marlene Dietrich. Surprisingly, by Billy Wilder.

Father is a Bachelor (1950 - b/w) - Silly, amiable sub-Disney comedy with William Holden adopted by a bunch of kids. Features an alternative birthday song, "Merry, Merry Birthday" to a tune approximating My Darling Clementine.

A Woman of Distinction (1950 - b/w) - Bland 50s comedy with Rosalind Russell and Ray Milland.

Father of the Bride (1950 - b/w)/Father's Little Dividend (1951 - b/w) - Well-made but bland A-rate Hollywood romcoms.

The Wooden Horse (1950 - b/w) - Generic WW2 prison movie.

Born Yesterday (1950 - b/w) - Judy Holliday slightly annoys me, maybe because her voice I'm sure was used as the template for the duff idiot girlfriends you'd have in the Simpsons romancing Mayor Quimby.

The Bullfighter and the Lady (1951 - b/w) - A blond Robert Stack goes to Mexico to become a bullfighter in ludicrous Republic-aiming-for-an-A-hit tat.

Kind Lady (1951 - b/w) - Ludicrous Victorian potboiler with Maurice Evans and Angela Lansbury and Ethel Barrymore.

A Place in the Sun (1951 - b/w) - Hollywood studio drama at its  most finely crafted but generic.

An American in Paris (1951)/The Last Time I Saw Paris (1954) - Always get these films get confused, as to which one has Roger Moore. It's the latter, but they're both set in the same city, the shonky MGM idyll of Paris.

What Price, Glory (1952) - John Ford and Cagney do to wartime France what the Quiet Man did to Ireland.

The Band Wagon (1953) - Great spectacle, but not very funny. With Jack Buchanan, Nanette Fabray and of course Fred Stair.

Executive Suite (1954 - b/w) - Typical MGM fluff.

Rains of Ranchipur (1955) - Ludicrous Indian saga with Richard Burton looking ridiculous in brownface.

Strategic Air Command (1955)/Bombers b-52 (1957) - One has Karl Malden, the other Jimmy Stewart. But they're the same film.

New Orleans Uncensored (1955 - b/w)  -Dreary Bill Castle Dragnet-alike.

Battle Cry (1955) - Overlong, dreary New Zealand-set war film. Tab Hunter feigns heterosexuality, while the words "Saipan operation" bring to mind a major incident in Irish international football.

Blackboard Jungle (1955) - The "teens" look silly dancing to Bill Haley. Even Sidney Poitier looks ancient, only because he looks the same he would for the next fifteen years, the ageless Adonis he is. Vic Morrow looks almost as old as Glenn Ford, but still positively cherubic compared to his usual self.

Baby Doll (1956 - b/w) - Overripe Southern melodrama.

Patterns (1956 - b/w) - Dreary teleplay adaptatin with Van Heflin.  See also The Bachelor Party (1957 - b/w) - despite sexy Carolyn Jones and Jack Warden in Crazy Like A Fox mode, the lead is the void Don Murray.

And God Created Woman (1956) - Apart from Bardot, an unremarkable colour soft-sex opus.

Autumn Leaves (1956 - b/w) -  Overripe melodrama with Joan Crawford and Cliff Robertson.

Bitter Victory (1957 - b/w) - Bland Burton warfare.

Until They Sail (1957 - b/w)/Two Loves (1961) - The former has Jean Simmons, Paul Newman and Joan Fontaine, and the other has Shirley MacLaine, Laurence Harvey and Jack Hawkins, but they're both tedious Hollywood romances set in a not-really-accurate version of New Zealand. Two Loves adds Maoris.  27 year old Nobu McCarthy plays a Japanese-American Maori schoolgirl. Afro-Puerto Rican Juano Hernandez plays a Maori chief. He's the best thing in the film.

Bonjour Tristesse (1958) - Messy, weepy teen drama with David Niven, Jean Seberg and Deborah Kerr.

The Inn of the Sixth Happiness (1958) - The stuff in 50s London, full of Capstan and a 50s Robinson Crusoe picture book is evocative, but the stuff in China/Wales is ludicrous, especially with Robert Donat and Curt Jurgens seemingly not wearing any makeup bar the odd bit of liner. But then again Ingrid Bergman is miscast too.

Auntie Mame (1958) - It's overlong, but Rosalind Russell is great, even though it is a series of vignettes. But watching it, a little voice in my head, "Why did they never do a version of this with Pat Routledge?"

The Brothers Karamazov (1958) - Overlong but beautifully shot even though it feels as Russian as Boris Badenov. Weird seeing a cherubic William Shatner.

Al Capone (1959 - b/w) - A great Steiger performance in a film that feels a cut above the Corman dreck it was released alongside.

Butterfield 8 (1960)  - Elizabeth Taylor is a hooker. Serves her right.

All in a Night's Work (1960) - Bland romcom with Shirley MacLaine and Dean Martin.

Back Street (1961) - Ludicrous weepie, a remake of a ropey (1932) melodrama also done in (1942), this time with Susan Hayward and John Gavin, but with its Little Europe renderings of Paris and London, it's just like every other Ross Hunter production.

The Sins of Rachel Cade (1961) - I watched this, and suddenly found myself crushing on Roger Moore, despite him being my favourite Bond since I was old enough to properly like Bond. Rog's playing an American in the RAF who falls in love with Angie Dickinson's doctor. The trouble is, his accent keeps going out. He begins every sentence as Rog, and then slips into something vaguely American. He just talks quieter. But he's supposed to be from Boston. Like The Singing Nun, another attempt to do The Nun's Story. This even has Peter Finch. The funniest thing is that Woody Strode is a witch doctor and he wears this cossack hat and thick liner, and he looks like he's a drag act doing a Boney M tribute.

Walk on the Wild Side (1962 - b/w) - Silly bonkbuster with Lar Harvey and Jane Fonda.

Hell is For Heroes (1962 - b/w) - Generic American idea of WW2 with Steve McQueen, Bobby Darin, Fess Parker, Bob Newhart, a strange ensemble of US stars of the era.

Love with the Proper Stranger (1963 - b/w) - Endearing though average New York love story.

Black Like Me (1964 - b/w) I know James Whitmore is supposed to look ridiculous, but that ridiculous? He's like a shaven gorilla. Maybe whiting up costar Roscoe Lee Browne might have worked better.

The Pumpkin Eater (1964 - b/w) - Snooze. At least, Yootha Joyce turns up. So, Max meets Mildred. (obscure reference to Anne Bancroft ITV-com Freddie and Max). And there's a nice telly and radio prop. 

Behold A Pale Horse (1964 - b/w)  - Dry Spanish nonsense with Gregory Peck, Anthony Quinn and Omar Sharif being shifty.

Love Has Many Faces (1965) - Pornographic muzak.

Battle of the Bulge (1965) - Overlong and unconvincing.

Baby the Rain Must Fall (1965 - b/w) - Steve McQueen and Lee Remick in a bleak country tale.

Rosie (1967) - Rosalind Russell is so grating she gets institutionalized.

The Wild Child (1969 - b/w) - Despite being by Truffaut, being in B/W makes it feel like a 60s French kids' TV serial like Robinson Crusoe or the Flashing Blade.

Anne of the Thousand Days (1969) - Typical Tudor historica. Not my thing.

The Getaway (1972)  - Way too long for what should be a brisk B-feature.

Junior Bonner (1972) - The theme sounded like a  lesser James Taylor. Turns out it is his brother Alex, but written by one Brian Potter, presumably before he moved back to Bolton, opened a club that flooded. Knowing that there were quite a few McQueen refs in Phoenix Nights, I wonder was it a subconscious lift.  Rodeo riders bore me. But rodeo clowns fascinate me.

WC Fields and Me (1975) - At least, Steiger is decent casting, unlike the similarly wretched Gable and Lombard (1976).

Sharks' Treasure (1976) - Cornel Wilde shows off his chest.

Bittersweet Love (1976) - Dull TV-ish Canadian tax shelter-esque (though actually an American production shot in the US, and set in Canada) incest nonsense with Meredith Baxter, Scott Hylands and Robert Lansing and Lana Turner.

Autumn Sonata (1978) - Bergman at his best. I.e. stilted, cold and so on, but that's the point with Bergman.

An Almost Perfect Affair (1979) - Is Dick Anthony Williams' character based on Fred Williamson? A tedious romcom set in Cannes, but it captures Cannes in the 70s.

The Falls (1980) - I don't like Peter Greenaway, but I really enjoyed this. Maybe because it's very like Look Around You, but also because it begins in Arklow. That's right, it begins in Arklow. Yes, Arklow. I know. Arklow, Wicklow. Can you believe it? Lord Snooty pops up too.

Air Crew (1980) - Overlong but really nicely shot, atmospheric Soviet disaster film.

The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas (1982) - It's joyful but it's the kind of country and western stuff my parents adore but I don't get.

Sunday 15 March 2020


The Man Who Broke the Bank of Monte Carlo (1935 - b/w) - Forgettable Ronald Colman cad comedy.

Operation 13 (1934 - b/w) - Semi-western period theatrics with Gary Cooper and the Pinkertons.

Show Them No Mercy (1935 - b/w) - Cesar Romero vehicle.

A Message to Garcia (1936 - b/w) - Cuban silliness with Barbara Stanwyck and Wallace Beery.

Anthony Adverse (1936 - b/w) - Once universally hailed a great film, this is a load of faux-Dickesian twaddle. The Harry Potter of its day. It has period adventures, but it also has sub-Hurricane tropical exotica.

Professional Soldier (1935 - b/w) - Victor McLaglen educates Freddie Bartholemew. Treacly.

Wings of the Morning (1937)  -Might be the most beautifully shot early color film I've seen. First British film in color. With Henry Fonda.

Sky Giant (1938 - b/w) - Richard Dix flies  a plane.

Abe Lincoln in Illinois (1940 - b/w) - Raymond Massey shakes locals' hands.

The Saint Takes Over (1940 - b/w) - Rote B-installment with George Sanders.

Wild Geese Calling (1941 - b/w)  -Almost-a-western north woods drama with Henry Fonda.

That Other Woman (1942 - b/w) - Forgettable comedy with James Ellison. Fox-B.

What a Woman (1943 - b/w) - Bland Rosalind Russell comedy.

Tonight We Raid Calais (1943 - b/w)  -Forgettable Fox WW2 faux-British RAF propaganda. See also They Came to Blow Up America (1943 - b/w).

Roger Touhy, Gangster (1944 - b/w) - Forgettable gangster fare with Anthony Quinn and Preston Foster.  See also Bermuda Mystery (1944 - b/w).

Murder in the Air (1944 - b/w) - Ronald Reagan nonsense.

Sunday Dinner for a Soldier (1944 - b/w) - Forgettable Fox sentimental propaganda.

Counter Attack (1945 - b/w) - Typical propaganda war movie with Paul Muni.

Don Juan Quilligan (1945 - b/w) - Forgettable comedy with William Bendix.

Sentimental Journey (1946 - b/w) - Maureen O'Hara dies, thus starting a family's titular and predictably icky voyage.

Jewels of Brandenburg (1947 - b/w) - Forgettable Fox B-mystery.

The Brasher Doubloon (1947 - b/w) - Daft Philip Marlowe B.

Gentleman's Agreement (1947 - b/w) - Typical 40s prestige product.

Miracle of the Bells (1948 - b/w) - Silly religious nonsense with Frank Sinatra.
Not to be confused with the western-esque Kirk Douglas/Cornel Wilde drama The Walls of Jericho (1948 - b/w).

Return of October (1948) - Glenn Ford and Terry Moore in Oirish horse silliness.

Down to the Sea in Ships (1949 - b/w) - Well-acted by Richard Widmark, Dean Stockwell (as good an actor age twelve as he was age fifty), Lionel Barrymore but still the same old American fishing saga.

The Fan (1949) - Bland American version of Wilde, with an ad on a bus for Gentleman's Agreement in the frame.

Come to the Stable (1949 - b/w) - Elsa Lanchester the highlight of this nun comedy.

Chicken every Sunday (1949 - b/w) -  Bland semi-western Fox comedy.

Slattery's Hurricane (1949 - b/w) - Richard Widmark military auto-aviation.

Task Force (1949 - b/w) - Not to be confused with Air Force (1943 - b/w).

Everybody Does It (1949 - b/w)  - Paul Douglas sings opera.

A Letter to 3 Wives (1950 - b/w) - Blandly serviceable Hollywood gloss.

Stella (1950 - b/w) - Bland black comedy with Victor Mature.

The Fireball (1950 - b/w) - Thirty-year-old orphan Mickey Rooney, starting to look his age and no longer the lean teen idol he once was does skating in a silly comedy, with one Marilyn Monroe down the cast.

On The Riviera (1951) - Danny Kaye does his English act. See also It's A Great Feeling (1949), The Kid from Brooklyn (1946), Up in Arms (1944), A Song is Born (1948), Wonder Man (1945), The Five Pennies (1950).

Anne of the Indies (1951) - Bland pirate antics with Jean Peters and Louis Jouuuuuuuuuuuurdaaaan.

Lydia Bailey (1952)  -Forgettable pirate adventure with Dale Robertson and Anne Francis, despite a strong turn from William Marshall at his Felix Dexter-iest.

Against All Flags (1952) - Universal colorama with a stiff Errol Flynn and Maureen O'Hara.

Androcles and the Lion (1952 - b/w) - Amiable but mannered Roman farce with Jean Simmons, the inevitable Victor Mature and Alan Young, halfway between Ian Lavender and Roddy McDowall.

The View from Pompey's Head (1955) - Lurid, forgettable vehicle for Dana Wynter and Richard Egan.

Illegal (1955 - b/w) - Bland Edward G. Robinson noir.

The Girl Can't Help It (1956)  -It does what it sets out to do. Though Tashlin and Jayne Mansfield never quite appeal.

Ghost Diver (1957 - b/w) - Fox trash.

Plunder Road (1957 - b/w) - Bland Fox programmer.

Oh Men, Oh Women (1957 - b/w) - Oh, David Niven. Oh, god. How could you? You're on autopilot.

No Down Payment (1957 - b/w)  - Depressing drama with Jeffrey Hunter, Joanne Woodward and Tony Randall and a young Pat Hingle, which I'd never really noticed before. To me, he'll always be Burton's Comm. Gordon.

Woman Obsessed (1959) - Nonsensical semi-western woman in peril Canadian-set prairie drama with Susan Hayward and Stephen Boyd.

The Story on Page One (1959 - b/w) - Boring courtroom drama with Rita Hayworth despite an incongruously American Hugh Griffith as judge.

Loves of Salammbo (1960) - Dreary Italian sword and sandal schlock. See also Legions of the Nile (1960).

The Millionairess (1960) - Peter Sellers doing his schtick, in a typical gentle 50s comedy.

Secret of the Purple Reef (1960) - Bland tropical thrills with Richard Chamberlain and Peter Falk.

7 Women from Hell (1961 - b/w) - Rubbish exploitation premake of the John Ford film.

Mr. Topaze (1961) - Confused Peter Sellers stab at seriousness.

Five Golden Hours (1961 - b/w) - Forgettable Italian-British comedy with Ernie Kovacs. He never found a fit in cinema. See also Operation Mad Ball (1957 - b/w) and the goofy why-are-they-dressed-as-Puritans sub-Beach Party silliness of Sail A Crooked Ship (1961).

The Wackiest Ship in the Army (1961) - Silly tropical comedy. Typical navy lark.

Where the Boys Are (1960) - Beach party froth.

Sons and Lovers (1960 - b/w) - Dean Stockwell so miscast the only way to take it seriously is to imagine this is Al Calavicci who has leapt into an English lad.

Circle of Deception (1960 - b/w) - Mid-Atlantic military nonsense with Bradford Dillman.

The Wizard of Baghdad (1960) - Goofy idiotic Arabian Nights comedy silliness with Dick Shawn.

Desire in the Dust (1960 - b/w) - Tedious Southern nonsense from Lippert, with Raymond Burr.

Beloved Infidel (1960) - Gregory Peck and Deborah Kerr in Fitzgerald-related gubbins.
Snow White and the Three Stooges (1961) - Silly, sub-Disney larks.

Bachelor Flat (1962)  - Goofy pseudo-teen comedy with Terry-Thomas plus period flashbacks.

It Happened in Athens (1962) - Goofball period Olympics comedy with Jayne Mansfield and the forgotten-even-while-on-screen Trax Colton.

The Condemned of Altona (1963 - b/w) - Long, unmemorable (bar Italian TV cameo) post-war epic with Sophia Loren and Maximilian Schell.

Of Love and Desire (1963) - Ropey bonkbuster with Merle Oberon and Curd Jurgens.

Thank Heaven for Small Favours (1963 -  b/w) - Baffling vehicle for Bourvil praying a  lot and having daydreams.

Take Her, She's Mine (1963) - James Stewart screams at Sandra Dee.

The Yellow Canary (1963 - b/w) - Bland Pat Boone nonsense.

Night Train to Paris (1964 - b/w) - Begins with Leslie Nielsen in a council estate, gets worse. Typical Brit quickie. Has Andre Maranne in it, because.

The Visit (1964 - b/w)  -Dreary drama with Anthony Quinn and Ingrid Bergman. The two reunited in  A Walk in the Spring Rain (1970, as slushy as the title would suggest, both figuratively and literally).

Man in the Middle (1964 - b/w) - Boring military trial thing with Robert Mitchum.

Ballad in Blue (1965) - Ray Charles plays himself in this odd melange of concert film and artificial drama where Tom Bell and Mary Peach argue over should their blind son get treatment for his eyes. Despite some location footage of London, with posters of A Hard Day's Night, it's mostly shot in Ireland. The likes of John "Tom Riordan" Cowley, DJ Bob Gallico and of all people, as a guitarist, future tourist-shop tat comedian Hal Roach pop up, and everything feels kind of artificial, expressionist, and it's directed by Paul Henreid.

El Greco (1966) - Bland biopic with Mel Ferrer.

Warning Shot (1967) - Dull TV-ish crime film despite a solid cast.

Bedazzled (1967) - What a load of cobblers.

The Heart is a Lonely Hunter (1968) - Alan Arkin lumbers about looking at Nick Carter novels. Chuck McCann is very funny, but I don't think he's supposed to be.

Don't Make Waves (1968) - Beach party with added middle-aged Tony Curtis having a crisis.

Secret Life of an American Wife (1968)  - Goofy sex com with Walter Matthau, but Anne Jackson is convincingly attractive.

John and Mary (1969) - Forgettable counterculture with Dustin and Mia.

The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie (1969) - Excellent performances, but it doesn't take too long to delve into melodramatic camp.

La Promesse (1969) - Bland boy-lusts-over-female-relative nonsense with Jacqueline Bisset.

Marriage of a Young Stockbroker (1971) - Another bland countercultural Richard Benjamin flick.

BS I Love You (1971) B.S., I think Peter Kastner is unlikeable. This is like a Confessions film for the New Hollywood set.

Two Lane Blacktop (1972) - Dreary road trip through America.

Trouble Man (1972) - Bland, serviceable blaxploiter.

Sounder (1972) - A family film, but great performances from Paul Winfield and his wonderful voice and Cicely Tyson.

Down the Ancient Staircase (1975) - Arty, nothingy Marcello Mastroianni insanity drama.

I Will... I Will... For Now (1976) - Diane Keaton and Elliot Gould. The highlight is Paul  Sorvino inventing the GoCompare man.

The Black Panther (1977) - Well-constructed, dark, sinister true life biopic with a memorable Donald Sumpter.

The Other Side of Midnight (1977) - The last film of the 50s. But with nudity. It feels outdated though, due to the phony backlot view of Europe. Michael Lerner as the head of Charvet (Charles Haughey's favourite). But it feels stilted, and directed by a US TV person, even though Charles Jarrott came through the CBC and ITV, and was one of Sydney Newman's chappies.

The Deer Hunter (1978) - It's way too long. But that's what Cimino does.

Raging Bull (1980) - It tries too hard to be this beautiful, arty ode to sweaty men boxing.

Brenda Starr (1989) - Godawful comic book pulp with Brooke Shields and Timothy Dalton. Basically a US version of Jane.

Loaded Weapon Part 1 (1993) - Idiotic spoof.